Lonely Loneliness

I have been wondering about those who are no longer here

Question:

I miss Cowboy

Response:

Luna hast spoke: Dravazed – I hope you’ve found the numbness you so eagerly sought. I’m trying to follow in your footsteps.  Please leave the porch light on. Phil?  What do you mean by this? Dravazed frequently spoke about wanting to return to the days when he did not feel the constant pain of loneliness and depression, when he simply did not feel at all.  I used to be that way too.  He called that feeling – or rather lack of feeling – "numbness".  Sometimes numbness is best.

Ah – okay.  I associate numb with dead.  Of course, dravazed was intensely suicidal – and so I was worried that is what you were saying. But I don’t want this thread to be about me Jean, it’s about some folks who I haven’t heard from in a long time.  I was just wondering how they are doing, and in a few cases, whether they are still alive. And I’m glad to see that so many have chimed in to mention those who slipped my mind.

Hm.  Well, you could easily have been on this list until lately.  Anyway, this thread was kind of cool, bittersweet. It’s always nice to talk with you, I hope you have a very good year in 02.

It’s always nice to talk to you, too.  I always got a very good feeling about you.  I hope you have a good new year too.  (numb?  there are better goals, but I know what you mean). jean – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – — Phil X-No-Archive: yes is in the headers

Response:

hi

Response:

sara/uberplush

she doesn’t have internet access at home. she’s working, living, still working to push through the hard emotional stuff. mena

she posted a month or two back. just a "hi" post, though. echo

i emailed her a while back. haven’t heard anything. hope she’s just busy with living. pete bubbles

don’t really know how either of them are these days.

Response:

((((((((((((((Phil)))))))))))) I wonder about these people, too. Happy New Year.

Response:

i wonder about: sara/uberplush mena echo pete bubbles j. – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Now that the new year has finally arrived, I have been thinking about a few ASDers who haven’t posted in a long time.  I often wonder what has become of them.

Response:

And Jana who does not respond to E-mail. And Adrian in Brazil who had her computer stolen. I phoned her on Christmas Eve and she is doing Ok most of the time. Stan – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Now that the new year has finally arrived, I have been thinking about a few ASDers who haven’t posted in a long time.  I often wonder what has become of them… K129000 (Chris) – Inbox still receiving but no replies are forthcoming.  Last we spoke, you had only one semester to go.  That was six months ago and you have vanished without a trace.  I hope you’re ok, I hope that you didn’t do anything silly. Bluehawk (Christopher) – No posts in ASD since July.  Perhaps you are still hiding on the undernet, but there are no traces any where else. Email has been disconnected.  Hope you’re still fighting the good fight dude. Discouraged (Maya) – A very nice person who experienced a very difficult time this past summer.  Maya, I still think about our solitary AOL chat all the time.  That instant messenger thingy killed my computer, but I haven’t removed it in case you reappear.  I hope you are doing alright. Dravazed – I hope you’ve found the numbness you so eagerly sought. I’m trying to follow in your footsteps.  Please leave the porch light on. IronRain (Jay) – Dude, you gave me one of my most restless nights ever.  I hope your still around and I hope you don’t regret making that call. JPG (Josh) – old and weathered for his years, hope you’re doing well dude. CF1791118 (Kathleen) – I know that you were growing weary of waiting for the right person to come along.  I hope your silence means that he finally has. Real Nut – You laughed (a lot), in spite of it all, and you made me laugh too.  Last you wrote, you were doing better.  I hope you still are. John Hanley, age 63 – Your last post was in February 2001.  I hope that you have finally found the peace that you deserve John, one way or another.  I hope the tears have stopped. Rudolph Berthold – We met while you were drinking Jack and contemplating your 9.  You had been through a lot, certainly more than me.  You were real alright.  I hope you still are. Crazy Matt – Not that I’m terribly unhappy that he isn’t posting here, but I still wonder how he is doing. TruthSeeker (Chris) – I know that you won’t be posting here anymore. I only wish that I had a chance to get to know you better before your fateful day.  I stop by and look at your picture often – it reminds me of how painful life can be, and of what lies on the other side of the edge. I know there are many more.  My memory is not the best.  I apologize for all of those who I have left of this short little list. I sit and wonder what may have become.  What am I to think? To those I have listed above, and to the many more that I have left off, I wish you peace, happiness and success. — Phil X-No-Archive: yes is in the headers

Remove "JUNK" for my valid address.

Response:

I’ve been thinking about Kylie/little mouse and Sarah/badly drawn girl.

I’ve talked to Sarah. She is on holiday vacation. I doubt that we will see her again on ASD. Stan Bri

Remove "JUNK" for my valid address.

Response:

Dravazed – I hope you’ve found the numbness you so eagerly sought. I’m trying to follow in your footsteps.  Please leave the porch light on.

Phil?  What do you mean by this? jean

Response:

I’ve been thinking about Kylie/little mouse and Sarah/badly drawn girl. Bri

Response:

Very touching post Phil and very appropriate for this day…. Becky <are those tears I feel? "I have seen the sea when it is stormy and wild; when it is quiet and serene; when it is dark and moody. And in all its moods, I see myself."      -Martin Buxbaum

Response:

I am very interested..If you would. Mick Lechner Elizabeth, NJ, USA

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Mick Lechner hast spoke: I am kinda dying to know where Kevin Huber is or how he’s doing. I really liked him.. Last I heard he was doing reasonably well though he no longer posts to ASD.  I think that RJ would surely know in case you are interested. — Phil X-No-Archive: yes is in the headers

Response:

I am kinda dying to know where Kevin Huber is or how he’s doing. I really liked him.. Mick Lechner Elizabeth, NJ, USA

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Now that the new year has finally arrived, I have been thinking about a few ASDers who haven’t posted in a long time.  I often wonder what has become of them… K129000 (Chris) – Inbox still receiving but no replies are forthcoming.  Last we spoke, you had only one semester to go.  That was six months ago and you have vanished without a trace.  I hope you’re ok, I hope that you didn’t do anything silly. Bluehawk (Christopher) – No posts in ASD since July.  Perhaps you are still hiding on the undernet, but there are no traces any where else. Email has been disconnected.  Hope you’re still fighting the good fight dude. Discouraged (Maya) – A very nice person who experienced a very difficult time this past summer.  Maya, I still think about our solitary AOL chat all the time.  That instant messenger thingy killed my computer, but I haven’t removed it in case you reappear.  I hope you are doing alright. Dravazed – I hope you’ve found the numbness you so eagerly sought. I’m trying to follow in your footsteps.  Please leave the porch light on. IronRain (Jay) – Dude, you gave me one of my most restless nights ever.  I hope your still around and I hope you don’t regret making that call. JPG (Josh) – old and weathered for his years, hope you’re doing well dude. CF1791118 (Kathleen) – I know that you were growing weary of waiting for the right person to come along.  I hope your silence means that he finally has. Real Nut – You laughed (a lot), in spite of it all, and you made me laugh too.  Last you wrote, you were doing better.  I hope you still are. John Hanley, age 63 – Your last post was in February 2001.  I hope that you have finally found the peace that you deserve John, one way or another.  I hope the tears have stopped. Rudolph Berthold – We met while you were drinking Jack and contemplating your 9.  You had been through a lot, certainly more than me.  You were real alright.  I hope you still are. Crazy Matt – Not that I’m terribly unhappy that he isn’t posting here, but I still wonder how he is doing. TruthSeeker (Chris) – I know that you won’t be posting here anymore. I only wish that I had a chance to get to know you better before your fateful day.  I stop by and look at your picture often – it reminds me of how painful life can be, and of what lies on the other side of the edge. I know there are many more.  My memory is not the best.  I apologize for all of those who I have left of this short little list. I sit and wonder what may have become.  What am I to think? To those I have listed above, and to the many more that I have left off, I wish you peace, happiness and success. — Phil X-No-Archive: yes is in the headers

Response:

Filed under: Loneliness Depression

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