Lonely Loneliness » Loneliness Lonely

Tragedy!

admin — Thu, 22 Dec 2005 00:00:00 +0000

Question:

Mad Mambo Master of Macedonia wrote: > Mxsmanic wrote in > news:h3quq1p7l9304lk30u8i7cqlio3fs61gho@4ax.com: > > Mad Mambo Master of Macedonia writes: > >> Assuming he actually existed. > > It’s pretty certain that he actually existed, but that’s where the > > certainty stops. > From wikipedia: Historicity of Jesus.

Wikipedia is written by whichever bigot fought hardest in the edit wars. On politics and religion it is utterly unreliable for that reason. > Contemporary non-Christian sources > Of the secular commentators living within memory of Jesus, several are > claimed to have written material relating to Jesus – Pliny the Younger, > Josephus, Suetonius, and Tacitus.

True. > Pliny the Younger condemned Christians as easily led fools,

Not a very accurate recollection of Letters X.96. He referred to them worshipping ‘Christ as a god’. > as did the rhetorician Lucian some years later.

Likewise refers to Jesus and the Christians. > There is an obscure reference to a Jewish leader called "Chrestus" in > Suetonius.

Or Christus — the spelling is unimportant, as Tertullian tells us. If this does not refer to Jesus — the only person named Christ in Roman records who is documented as a source of dissention in Roman synagogues at that date, then no-one knows what it means. > Surviving manuscripts of Tacitus (in a passage in the Annals > written c. 115 CE), summarise popular opinion about Jesus, but do not > demonstrate access to any independent source of information.

This is a clever falsification of what Tacitus wrote. Tacitus does not say that he is summarising popular opinion. He merely states what he states. The idea that ancient writers footnoted themselves is curious, but of course wrong. > However, there was no mention of these passages by early Christian writers, in the > case of Tacitus nothing being noted about Christianity until the > ‘translation’ by Sulpicius Severus.

Since Tertullian quotes Pliny, this is mistaken. Sulpicius Severus has access to more of Tacitus than we do. > The most substantial non-Christian source is Josephus. Both John the Baptist > and James the Just are also documented in Josephus. The only record that > unambiguously mentions Jesus himself is that of Josephus. However, its > authenticity is still greatly debated.

There are two mentions; the long one has clearly suffered damage, the short one is universally considered genuine. > Josephus > Main article: Josephus on Jesus

I know for a fact, from personal experience, that this article is being edited by people who (a) do not know what the scholarship is and (b) are determined that the article shall not include anything from scholarship they have not read themselves unless it serves to attack the authenticity of the text. > Many Christians use a passage from Josephus as evidence that the Bible is > not the only contemporary document proclaiming the truth of their faith > and its history (such as the Resurrection of Jesus as Christ, who was > executed at the suggestion of Jewish leaders, and won many converts). > However, John Dominic Crossan and K. H. Rengstorff have noted that the > passage has many internal indicators that seem to be inconsistent with > the rest of Josephus’ writing and with what is known about Josephus, > leading them to think that part or all of the passage may have been > forged.

The general consensus today for the long passage is ‘genuine but corrupt.’ All the best, Roger Pearse

Response:

Mad Mambo Master of Macedonia wrote: – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> Mxsmanic wrote in > news:h3quq1p7l9304lk30u8i7cqlio3fs61gho@4ax.com: >>Mad Mambo Master of Macedonia writes: >>>Assuming he actually existed. >>It’s pretty certain that he actually existed, but that’s where the >>certainty stops. > From wikipedia: Historicity of Jesus. > Contemporary non-Christian sources > Of the secular commentators living within memory of Jesus, several are > claimed to have written material relating to Jesus – Pliny the Younger, > Josephus, Suetonius, and Tacitus. Pliny the Younger condemned Christians > as easily led fools, as did the rhetorician Lucian some years later. > There is an obscure reference to a Jewish leader called "Chrestus" in > Suetonius. Surviving manuscripts of Tacitus (in a passage in the Annals > written c. 115 CE), summarise popular opinion about Jesus, but do not > demonstrate access to any independent source of information. However, > there was no mention of these passages by early Christian writers, in the > case of Tacitus nothing being noted about Christianity until the > ‘translation’ by Sulpicius Severus. The most substantial non-Christian > source is Josephus. Both John the Baptist and James the Just are also > documented in Josephus. The only record that unambiguously mentions Jesus > himself is that of Josephus. However, its authenticity is still greatly > debated. > Josephus > Main article: Josephus on Jesus > Many Christians use a passage from Josephus as evidence that the Bible is > not the only contemporary document proclaiming the truth of their faith > and its history (such as the Resurrection of Jesus as Christ, who was > executed at the suggestion of Jewish leaders, and won many converts). > However, John Dominic Crossan and K. H. Rengstorff have noted that the > passage has many internal indicators that seem to be inconsistent with > the rest of Josephus’ writing and with what is known about Josephus, > leading them to think that part or all of the passage may have been > forged.

I believe the correct euphemism is "interpolation". HTH, August Pamplona — I’m convinced that the universe has been created by someone with a particularly vile sense of humor. I would like to propose a theory of "intelligent malicious asshole design." – Antares on a.s.s. a.a. # 1811 apatriot #20 Eater of smut Proud member of the reality-based community. The address in this message’s ‘From’ field, in accordance with individual.net’s TOS, is real. However, almost all messages reaching this address are deleted without human intervention. In other words, if you e-mail me there, I will not receive your message. To make sure that e-mail messages actually reach me, make sure that my e-mail address is not hot.

Response:

void * wrote: > "LisatheSequel" wrote in message news :domfqs$miu$1 @ newsreader3.netcologne.de… >>Mad Mambo Master of Macedonia wrote: >>>Hardpan wrote in news :s54sq11rv43mqn64o57i18egvsj125trcj @ 4ax.com: >>>>Jesus was born some time in March, by most accounts, but no one source can say what day. >>> Assuming he actually existed. >>He existed. The Cathedral (Dome) in my town has his underwear in a glass case. > So…what brand does he wear?

Before BVD, there was IXP

Response:

- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -void * wrote: > "LisatheSequel" wrote in message > news:domfqs$miu$1@newsreader3.netcologne.de… >>Mad Mambo Master of Macedonia wrote: >>>Hardpan wrote in >>>news:s54sq11rv43mqn64o57i18egvsj125trcj@4ax.com: >>>>Jesus was born some time in March, by most accounts, but no one source >>>>can say what day. >>> Assuming he actually existed. >>He existed. The Cathedral (Dome) in my town has his underwear in a glass >>case. > So…what brand does he wear?

IHS.

Response:

Antares writes: > Yeah, that’s the major distinction I make as well. There’s only work > or vacation. Anything else is pretty much irrelevant. Christmas, > Thanksgiving, Halloween, New Year’s, etc. — they can call it whatever > they want, as long as I don’t have to come to work.

Exactly. > The reason I make this distinction is simple. > Vacations are when I do things I want to do. > Holidays are when I do things others want me to do.

I had not thought of it that way before, but you have a point. That’s also a good argument in favor of spending holidays alone. — Transpose mxsmanic and gmail to reach me by e-mail.

Response:

tariq.1.ra…@spamgourmet.com writes: > those of you who have been supportive, thank you. it helps one go thru > a day that is hyped to be one of merriment and love.

I pity those who feel merriment and love only one day a year. — Transpose mxsmanic and gmail to reach me by e-mail.

Response:

Mad Mambo Master of Macedonia writes: > Assuming he actually existed.

It’s pretty certain that he actually existed, but that’s where the certainty stops. I wonder what people will say about Joseph Smith 2000 years from now. — Transpose mxsmanic and gmail to reach me by e-mail.

Response:

Mxsmanic wrote in news:h3quq1p7l9304lk30u8i7cqlio3fs61gho@4ax.com: > Mad Mambo Master of Macedonia writes: >> Assuming he actually existed. > It’s pretty certain that he actually existed, but that’s where the > certainty stops.

From wikipedia: Historicity of Jesus. Contemporary non-Christian sources Of the secular commentators living within memory of Jesus, several are claimed to have written material relating to Jesus – Pliny the Younger, Josephus, Suetonius, and Tacitus. Pliny the Younger condemned Christians as easily led fools, as did the rhetorician Lucian some years later. There is an obscure reference to a Jewish leader called "Chrestus" in Suetonius. Surviving manuscripts of Tacitus (in a passage in the Annals written c. 115 CE), summarise popular opinion about Jesus, but do not demonstrate access to any independent source of information. However, there was no mention of these passages by early Christian writers, in the case of Tacitus nothing being noted about Christianity until the ‘translation’ by Sulpicius Severus. The most substantial non-Christian source is Josephus. Both John the Baptist and James the Just are also documented in Josephus. The only record that unambiguously mentions Jesus himself is that of Josephus. However, its authenticity is still greatly debated. Josephus Main article: Josephus on Jesus Many Christians use a passage from Josephus as evidence that the Bible is not the only contemporary document proclaiming the truth of their faith and its history (such as the Resurrection of Jesus as Christ, who was executed at the suggestion of Jewish leaders, and won many converts). However, John Dominic Crossan and K. H. Rengstorff have noted that the passage has many internal indicators that seem to be inconsistent with the rest of Josephus’ writing and with what is known about Josephus, leading them to think that part or all of the passage may have been forged.

Response:

Hardpan wrote in news:s54sq11rv43mqn64o57i18egvsj125trcj@4ax.com: > Jesus was born some time in March, by most accounts, but no one source > can say what day.

Assuming he actually existed. — As for the pastor, after four days of listening to science experts dismantling the case for intelligent design, he was unimpressed. "They’re babblers," said the pastor, the Rev. Jim Grove, who leads a 40-member independent Baptist church outside of Dover. "The more Ph.D.’s you get, it seems like the further away from God you get." (NY Times, 10-2-05)

Response:

Mad Mambo Master of Macedonia wrote: > Hardpan wrote in > news:s54sq11rv43mqn64o57i18egvsj125trcj@4ax.com: >>Jesus was born some time in March, by most accounts, but no one source >>can say what day. > Assuming he actually existed.

He existed. The Cathedral (Dome) in my town has his underwear in a glass case.

Response:

LisatheSequel wrote in news:domfqs$miu$1 @newsreader3.netcologne.de: – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> Mad Mambo Master of Macedonia wrote: >> Hardpan wrote in >> news:s54sq11rv43mqn64o57i18egvsj125trcj@4ax.com: >>>Jesus was born some time in March, by most accounts, but no one source >>>can say what day. >> Assuming he actually existed. > He existed. The Cathedral (Dome) in my town has his > underwear in a glass case.

Good enough for me. — As for the pastor, after four days of listening to science experts dismantling the case for intelligent design, he was unimpressed. "They’re babblers," said the pastor, the Rev. Jim Grove, who leads a 40-member independent Baptist church outside of Dover. "The more Ph.D.’s you get, it seems like the further away from God you get." (NY Times, 10-2-05)

Response:

tariq.1.ra…@spamgourmet.com wrote: > x-no-archive: yes > it will be extraordinarily quiet. nobody visits. nobody to visit. i > will cook a couple lonely meals and eat them in my apt. no presents to > give and none to get.

Can you really feel that bad? You’d wouldn’t be posting. You’d probably have already commited suicide! Not to worry. Remember that it’s even worse feeling lonely in the midst of a crowd. You’re happier than you realize. =)

Response:

"LisatheSequel" wrote in message

news:domfqs$miu$1@newsreader3.netcologne.de… > Mad Mambo Master of Macedonia wrote: >> Hardpan wrote in >> news:s54sq11rv43mqn64o57i18egvsj125trcj@4ax.com: >>>Jesus was born some time in March, by most accounts, but no one source >>>can say what day. >> Assuming he actually existed. > He existed. The Cathedral (Dome) in my town has his underwear in a glass > case.

So…what brand does he wear?

Response:

Mickey wrote: > My 6 titted bitch chewed up by cell phone charger. Now, I am cut off > from all the 2 titted bitches, and everyone else for that matter. > Fucking jealous bitches! > -M

I wake up in the morning and I feel the pain in my head If its rest I need I’d rather be dead No destinations in this life I live No expectations I just drift and drift and drift

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tariq.1.ra…@spamgourmet.com wrote in news:1135432263.585433.99710 @g14g2000cwa.googlegroups.com: > x-no-archive: yes > it will be extraordinarily quiet. nobody visits. nobody to visit. i > will cook a couple lonely meals and eat them in my apt. no presents to > give and none to get.

Me too, Brussels sprouts potatoes and bacon and a couple of dvd’s I rented. No fancy dinners, no family, actually…one called today but couldn’t be called back. So it’s me and the videos. Maybe some ghosts will visit me when "the sixth sense" is on tv… that would be fun. A poltergeist or something at Christmas, I’m sick anyway, got a cold and have fever. So merry christmas to you all. (including NYC NYXXX)

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In article <1135432263.585433.99…@g14g2000cwa.googlegroups.com>, tariq.1.ra…@spamgourmet.com says… > x-no-archive: yes >it will be extraordinarily quiet. nobody visits. nobody to visit. i >will cook a couple lonely meals and eat them in my apt. no presents to >give and none to get.

It is a day just like any other. It is even not even Jesus’ birthday. The date I get for it, is 3rd February, which is more likely, placing him as an Aquarian. Anyway it’s a good time to clean the place up, for me anyway. Or try to at least… What I like to do, is to help bring about the demise of Christianity as we know it, and the same with the Jews and Muslims too – give everyone a short sharp shock of truthfulness and reality. Clear the cobwebs that has gathered over centuries of muddled beliefs that these have. (Perhaps it’s my job to be ‘the cleaner’ to help clean the world, so that it will be a better place to live in?) To show a universal unified understanding of the universe in which we live – in which everyone goes through the same process of living and dying, and no one gets preferential treatment over each other. We are all the same, no matter what skin colour, what possessions or money you had, what experiences you’ve been through, and what belief system, etc you hold dear. We still go through the exit door (death) the same as everybody else does – to the other side as we change from one dimension to another. Loneliness is another illusion to realise – that we are connected with other people, and to realise that new connections can be made. It is up to yourself to make the changes so that you won’t be so lonely any more. Harvey

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In article , hard…@yahoo.com says… – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text ->On Sat, 24 Dec 2005 21:46:00 +0000 (UTC), k…@ing.notin.aus (Your >Name Here=Harvey) wrote: >>In article <1135432263.585433.99…@g14g2000cwa.googlegroups.com>, >>tariq.1.ra…@spamgourmet.com says… >>> x-no-archive: yes >>>it will be extraordinarily quiet. nobody visits. nobody to visit. i >>>will cook a couple lonely meals and eat them in my apt. no presents to >>>give and none to get. >>It is a day just like any other. >>It is even not even Jesus’ birthday. The date I get for it, is 3rd February, >>which is more likely, placing him as an Aquarian. >This is partly true. >Jesus was born some time in March, by most accounts, but no one source >can say what day. >The Church moved it to the Winter Solstice time period to draw pagans >into the Catholic Religion. >>Anyway it’s a good time to clean the place up, for me anyway. >>Or try to at least… >>What I like to do, is to help bring about the demise of Christianity >>as we know it, and the same with the Jews and Muslims too – give everyone >>a short sharp shock of truthfulness and reality. >Good luck doing that. >More then enough religious people would gladly kill you for touching >their beliefs and they would sleep soundly at night after doing so.

Yeah, well – man has to learn that to kill and murder people for any reason is simply to live without peace. Their beliefs won’t die, if it is sound. If they kill for their beliefs, it shows how unsound their beliefs are. >Better to dwell upon political affairs were one can do some good, and >let the church-dwellers do as they please, within reason, of course

Religion is political. It always was, and always will be. >>Clear the cobwebs that has gathered over centuries of muddled beliefs >>that these have. (Perhaps it’s my job to be ‘the cleaner’ to help clean >>the world, so that it will be a better place to live in?) >You wont be cleaning anything my friend. Man needs to believe that his >essence wont die forever, when his body does.

This is already true, without any help from God whatsoever. – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text ->You wont change that fact in your lifetime or the next or the next. >>To show a universal unified understanding of the universe in which we live – >>in which everyone goes through the same process of living and dying, >>and no one gets preferential treatment over each other. >Bullshit. Live isn’t fair and lots of people get preferential >treatment in life. >After that, who can say? >>We are all the same, >>no matter what skin colour, what possessions or money you had, what >>experiences you’ve been through, and what belief system, etc you hold dear. >>We still go through the exit door (death) the same as everybody else does – >>to the other side as we change from one dimension to another. >And you can prove this beyond doubt, can you?

This is provable in logic – and so why not in life? Life follows logic, and reason. There is a reason for everything. And those who follow God, throw out reason altogether. Harvey – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text ->>Loneliness is another illusion to realise – that we are connected with >>other people, and to realise that new connections can be made. >>It is up to yourself to make the changes so that you won’t be so lonely >>any more. >Many of the people here cannot or will not do that for various reasons >know only to themselves. >Loneliness is a state of mind, that comes from within, not from >without.

Response:

Mad Mambo Master of Macedonia wrote: > Mickey wrote in news:XDIqf.57744$lh.54495 > @tornado.ohiordc.rr.com: >>My 6 titted bitch chewed up by cell phone charger. Now, I am cut off >>from all the 2 titted bitches, and everyone else for that matter. >>Fucking jealous bitches! >>-M > I think the phrase "titted bitches" is marking a new nadir for A.S.S.

Do you think if I used 2 legged and 4 legged that would raise the level? -M

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Mickey wrote in news:7IXqf.58058$lh.41565 @tornado.ohiordc.rr.com: – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> Mad Mambo Master of Macedonia wrote: >> Mickey wrote in news:XDIqf.57744$lh.54495 >> @tornado.ohiordc.rr.com: >>>My 6 titted bitch chewed up by cell phone charger. Now, I am cut off >>>from all the 2 titted bitches, and everyone else for that matter. >>>Fucking jealous bitches! >>>-M >> I think the phrase "titted bitches" is marking a new nadir for A.S.S. > Do you think if I used 2 legged and 4 legged that would raise the level? > -M

Placental versus marsupial might sink it. — As for the pastor, after four days of listening to science experts dismantling the case for intelligent design, he was unimpressed. "They’re babblers," said the pastor, the Rev. Jim Grove, who leads a 40- member independent Baptist church outside of Dover. "The more Ph.D.’s you get, it seems like the further away from God you get." (NY Times, 10-2- 05)

Response:

tariq.1.ra…@spamgourmet.com writes: > it will be extraordinarily quiet. nobody visits. nobody to visit. i > will cook a couple lonely meals and eat them in my apt. no presents to > give and none to get.

It’s a day like any other. To me, there are only days when I must work, and days when I don’t have to work. I don’t make any other distinctions. Since I don’t like to receive visitors and nobody wants to visit me, and since I always eat meals identically in my apartment, and since I have neither presents to give nor presents to get, Christmas is no different from any other day. The only thing I can imagine that might make a distinction for me is that so many places are closed on Christmas Day, but since that day is a Sunday this year, a lot of places would be closed, anyway. And I usually don’t go anywhere between Friday evening and Monday morning. — Transpose mxsmanic and gmail to reach me by e-mail.

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So come here and talk with other people who might be in the same boat.

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You could volunteer at the homeless shelter or a suicide hotline. — As for the pastor, after four days of listening to science experts dismantling the case for intelligent design, he was unimpressed. "They’re babblers," said the pastor, the Rev. Jim Grove, who leads a 40-member independent Baptist church outside of Dover. "The more Ph.D.’s you get, it seems like the further away from God you get." (NY Times, 10-2-05)

Response:

wrote in message

news:1135432263.585433.99710@g14g2000cwa.googlegroups.com… > x-no-archive: yes > it will be extraordinarily quiet. nobody visits. nobody to visit. i > will cook a couple lonely meals and eat them in my apt. no presents to > give and none to get.

Well anyway… "Happy Christmas" from me Pervus

Response:

My 6 titted bitch chewed up by cell phone charger. Now, I am cut off from all the 2 titted bitches, and everyone else for that matter. Fucking jealous bitches! -M

Response:

Mickey wrote in news:XDIqf.57744$lh.54495 @tornado.ohiordc.rr.com: > My 6 titted bitch chewed up by cell phone charger. Now, I am cut off > from all the 2 titted bitches, and everyone else for that matter. > Fucking jealous bitches! > -M

I think the phrase "titted bitches" is marking a new nadir for A.S.S. — As for the pastor, after four days of listening to science experts dismantling the case for intelligent design, he was unimpressed. "They’re babblers," said the pastor, the Rev. Jim Grove, who leads a 40-member independent Baptist church outside of Dover. "The more Ph.D.’s you get, it seems like the further away from God you get." (NY Times, 10-2-05)

Response:

Why are we lonely?

admin — Sun, 13 Nov 2005 00:00:00 +0000

Question:

Life has many important lessons for us, and loneliness is one of them. It is a very important lesson – what loneliness means to each one of us. Some people do have big egos or are ruled by their intelligence – others just feel, using their spirit and awareness – and others by other means? We all function differently, have different attitudes and beliefs. Loneliness isn’t the only thing we have in common, there are bound to be groups/types of people we all fall into. Understanding the type of person you are, will help you understand your life better. Harvey In article <8b2151$3p…@nnrp1.deja.com>, leole…@my-deja.com says… – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> Our loneliness didn’t create by other people that we blame on other > people for our loneliness. I’m sure that this is the case of > almost everyone here. If we honestly open our mind and heart to > ask a question why the so loneliness, we realize that we create our > loneliness. Why we create our loneliness? Because we only care > for ourselve. We are so egoistic that we only care for our body. > We only want to satisfy what our body need. We are like a child. > Our ego separate us. Ego is a disease. Ego is thing we want that > we really don’t need which we try to get it all the time that. > Ego never never satisfy us. >Sent via Deja.com http://www.deja.com/ >Before you buy.

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DaYsLeePeR wrote in message <38d63aaf.6359…@news.edgeworld.net>… >On Sun, 19 Mar 2000 07:55:16 GMT, leole…@my-deja.com wrote: >> Our loneliness didn’t create by other people that we blame on other >> people for our loneliness. I’m sure that this is the case of >> almost everyone here. If we honestly open our mind and heart to >> ask a question why the so loneliness, we realize that we create our >> loneliness. Why we create our loneliness? Because we only care >> for ourselve. We are so egoistic that we only care for our body. >> We only want to satisfy what our body need. We are like a child. >> Our ego separate us. Ego is a disease. Ego is thing we want that >> we really don’t need which we try to get it all the time that. >> Ego never never satisfy us.

I think ego is a word… and just like many abstract words, it’s over-used and often abused… love, truth, god – abstract words that people use to dream, avoid, live, die, give, take, and kill for… but I don’t think words and abstract ideas are not to blame… if you use ego in the Freudian sense (if he actually did coin the term), then libido is the word defining only caring for the body… ego is caring for the self, an identity one strives to create and nurture… id would be the thoughtless selfish aspect of the Freudian trilogy… the third component would be superego, or social conscience… interesting that the ego, when deemed super, cares for not just the one identity but for the identity and nurturing of the species and beyond… but then, I’m not much into Freud’s thoughts or word… the word I’d choose to associate with the roots of isolation or loneliness would be fear… intellectual fear, to be more specific… it can also be termed as insecurity… giving it too much power and control over thought and action leads to failure which leads to loss of confidence and eventually lower self-esteem… from my perspective though, it would be wrong to blame fear… for fear, like anything, is only as good or bad as what one does with it… when one chooses to think about fear too much one creates a loop of insecurity… and then one might no longer see it was a choice… some might not see what I am saying for this reason… that’s a catch-22… if one does not find a way out of the thought loop, it becomes reality and a self-fulfilling negative life… that is the internal view… socially it translates into barriers of thoughts… expectations that lead to disappointments… prejudices that lead to ignorance and conflicts… misunderstandings that lead to mistakes and worse… as I see it, the root is spending too much time giving too much energy to fearful thoughts… and not enough time or energy focused on love and hope… but most of all, inaction… standing (or sitting) still and thinking for too long… the habit becomes a way of life… and the thought loop shows no way out… there’s some theory to ponder… reach out of your thoughts, share them in words and also by putting them into action… acknowledge fears, but trust hope and love and give hope and love, not fear… at every moment in time you have a choice… at least two paths… one path is motivated by fear… the other motivated by love… it is always, whether you consciouly know it or not, your choice… >I strongly dissagree with this statement because it’s too >generalised. It may

hold true for some, but not all. >My loneliness isn’t caused by others, or myself. It’s caused by the >hours I work, the fact that I cannot see my daughter more than twice >a month,

and the fact that I now live 300km away from all my friends. >I am merely a victim of circumstance, and not of other people.

behind my often analytical words are feelings without ends… heights unimagined and bottomless pits… in the deepest of the pits is an experience similar to the one you describe… the words allow me detach from the physical enough to explore the experience and resolve the feelings… sometimes it’s much more challenging than it may appear… so I sigh deeply here and offer a *HUG* last year I was in a city that was hell for me for many reasons, least being I knew no one there… I worked more than 90 hours a week on average and was torn from my family… I set a goal to save enough to move on… it meant sacrificing the whole year… but I did… now I am accepting the loss of family (the most challenging part that may never be completely resolved) and living in a place much healthier for me… healing inside allows me to start reaching out again… and life goes on with renewed hope… I hope you find a way to change your circumstance… >If I had a life, I wouldn’t know what to feed it.

whatever you like that makes you feel good and harms no one honest love, ric if a heart beats in a forest and nobody hears it . . . .

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OB wrote: > Chris M wrote: > > It sometimes feels easier to just remain lonely than to > > make the effort to try and do something about it (see ‘How soon is now?’ > > by The Smiths). > "So you stand on your ownAnd you leave on your own > And you go home, and you cry, and you want to die…" > (possibly misquoted, I have the tape somewhere but can’t be bothered to > check)

Yep.. that’s the one… though I think the Love Spit Love cover is better than the Smiths’ original (oo.. heresy). > My reading is that this song is about someone who *does* make the effort, by > (e.g.) going out to a club in the hope that he will meet "someone", but > doesn’t know how to go about it once he is there. I am sure some here can > identify. I can.

I thought it was about the Teletubbies but I may have just been confused. I can identify with this, although given that I’m not exactly a clubbing person I find it applies more to the whole of my life than anything specific (jumps around waving daffodils)

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>blame on other >> people for our loneliness.

How true, the reason for my loneliness is due to being hurt by people, not all people but a selective few, so I built a wall around myself to prevent being hurt, I just do not allow people to close to me , so therefore create my own lonliness

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Chris M wrote: > It sometimes feels easier to just remain lonely than to > make the effort to try and do something about it (see ‘How soon is now?’ > by The Smiths).

"So you stand on your ownAnd you leave on your own And you go home, and you cry, and you want to die…" (possibly misquoted, I have the tape somewhere but can’t be bothered to check) My reading is that this song is about someone who *does* make the effort, by (e.g.) going out to a club in the hope that he will meet "someone", but doesn’t know how to go about it once he is there. I am sure some here can identify. I can.

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On Sun, 19 Mar 2000 07:55:16 GMT, leole…@my-deja.com wrote: > Our loneliness didn’t create by other people that we blame on other > people for our loneliness. I’m sure that this is the case of > almost everyone here. If we honestly open our mind and heart to > ask a question why the so loneliness, we realize that we create our > loneliness. Why we create our loneliness? Because we only care > for ourselve. We are so egoistic that we only care for our body. > We only want to satisfy what our body need. We are like a child. > Our ego separate us. Ego is a disease. Ego is thing we want that > we really don’t need which we try to get it all the time that. > Ego never never satisfy us.

I strongly dissagree with this statement because it’s too generalised. It may hold true for some, but not all. My loneliness isn’t caused by others, or myself. It’s caused by the hours I work, the fact that I cannot see my daughter more than twice a month, and the fact that I now live 300km away from all my friends. I am merely a victim of circumstance, and not of other people. _________________________________________________ If I had a life, I wouldn’t know what to feed it.

Response:

In article <20000319152712.02501.00003…@ng-ce1.aol.com>, d…@aol.com (D2u2) writes: >Subject: Re: Why are we lonely? >From: d…@aol.com (D2u2) >Date: 19 Mar 2000 20:27:12 GMT >>blame on other >>> people for our loneliness. >How true, the reason for my loneliness is due to being hurt by people, not >all >people but a selective few, so I built a wall around myself to prevent being >hurt, I just do not allow people to close to me , so therefore create my own >lonliness

Yes…I think that most lonely people have that wall for various reasons, and it is sometimes very difficult to bring the wall down and risk the same pain that caused us to build it. But….we should always try to be chipping away at it, so that one day it will crumble. At least, that’s what I try to do…though at times the progress I have made is lost and the wall gets reinforced….but we have to keep hoping and keep trying or there is no chance for us to rid ourselves of this loneliness. No….it’s not easy….but it can be done. Smiles, Gina http://hometown.aol.com//lawdawga/HomePpage.html *Visit ASLFAQ’s FAQ Page* http://members.aol.com/aslfaq

Response:

Our loneliness didn’t create by other people that we blame on other people for our loneliness. I’m sure that this is the case of almost everyone here. If we honestly open our mind and heart to ask a question why the so loneliness, we realize that we create our loneliness. Why we create our loneliness? Because we only care for ourselve. We are so egoistic that we only care for our body. We only want to satisfy what our body need. We are like a child. Our ego separate us. Ego is a disease. Ego is thing we want that we really don’t need which we try to get it all the time that. Ego never never satisfy us. Sent via Deja.com http://www.deja.com/ Before you buy.

Response:

leole…@my-deja.com wrote: > Our loneliness didn’t create by other people that we blame on other > people for our loneliness.

The feeling of loneliness or shyness can be the result of many things, external or internal. It sometimes feels easier to just remain lonely than to make the effort to try and do something about it (see ‘How soon is now?’ by The Smiths). > I’m sure that this is the case of > almost everyone here. If we honestly open our mind and heart to > ask a question why the so loneliness, we realize that we create our > loneliness.

I don’t think we create it. We just let it continue.

Response:

"NYC XYZ" wrote in news:1131993823.932250.166320@g44g2000cwa.googlegroups.com: – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> notmeno wrote: >> I bet you guys are something like me. extremely shy and reseverved >> most of the time. > No, not me no. =) >> Sit back and play Chess and beat idiots most of the time. > Wish I could play more chess! I’m not into playing strangers, though. > I don’t know…but chess is one of those games I like against > friends…perhaps ’cause it’s so "aggressive"…! > And no, I don’t beat idiots ’cause I don’t play them to begin with. >> Try to >> find out if there are any real challenges left in this world.. > ROTFLMAO — try love! As in Erich Fromm’s understanding outlined in > "Art of Loving"…and, while you’re at it, Zen meditation and > enlightenment, a la Fromm’s "Zen and Psychoanalysis"…and then > Krishnamurti’s often-enigmatic "Think on These Things" and > "Commentaries on Living" series. > Nothing speaks to ignorance so much as boredom and world-weariness > (not a dig, mind you; just saying). >> Spend >> Thousands of dollars on comic collections like I do and try not to be >> around people because they IRritate us? > Ah, comic books! I’d love to get back into that again — except other > activities like kayaking and parachuting and horseback-riding and > tennis and golf and piano practice and bicycling and skiing (the legal > kind) and dining out eat up most of my money! >> But although we are a special breed we do need some human contact >> once in a while so we form relationships and generally they dont work >> out. > Depends on what we do with them — there are no victims, only > volunteers. >> I bet that an overwhelming number of lonely people are only >> children. I >> am one. > In a sense, yes, they’re children because they are "immature" — they > don’t know how to be by themselves and need constant attention (that > they simmer away in isolation doesn’t mean that they don’t need > constant attention). >> I have a very large Dog his name is Duke and he is my Current >> FAmily. > I’d like a dog. But I can’t stand dog hairs and poop! Luckily, there > are people. =) >> I am rich and do not have to work, in the usual sense. > That’s your first problem. >> I am >> writing my novel….. > On usenet? =) >> Dont be so Lonely my dear. come and see >> us…………………………… David > "Loneliness" doesn’t exist.

Sometimes I wonder if you’re just here to pi.. off some people. (Correct me if I’m wrong) And that’s just because YOU HAVE BEEN IN THE ARMY, right? And some sergeant kick your butt, but LITTLE you is still whining over it, So you’re going to do the same because little you is still mad about the sergeant issue. It’s all so easy like, haha, I got some arguments! Like little weapons to scare off easily impressed ones, while you and I know that he’s probably going to loose HIS money sooner or later, because he falls in love with the "wrong woman" or has "friends" or maybe his own "ignorance" that will get him into a life where money will haunt him into his lonely hours, like a Scrooge at Christmas. But he also may be lucky with money, when having the right intentions on using it. Not when he’s spending his time playing chess against "idiots" like myself who were taught chess by their fathers and still have a hard time playing a decent game. Now I am sad, being reminded by myself that I’m actually living in a military system. I better watch Bruce Almighty on TV now.

Response:

Ethan wrote: > Sometimes I wonder if you’re just here to pi.. off some people. (Correct > me if I’m wrong)

You are. But how to correct you? > And that’s just because YOU HAVE BEEN IN THE ARMY, right? And some > sergeant kick your butt, but LITTLE you is still whining over it, So > you’re going to do the same because little you is still mad about the > sergeant issue.

???? > It’s all so easy like, haha, I got some arguments! Like little weapons > to scare off easily impressed ones, while you and I know that he’s > probably going to loose HIS money sooner or later, because he falls in > love with the "wrong woman" or has "friends" or maybe his own > "ignorance" that will get him into a life where money will haunt him > into his lonely hours, like a Scrooge at Christmas.

???? > But he also may be lucky with money, when having the right intentions on > using it. Not when he’s spending his time playing chess against > "idiots" like myself who were taught chess by their fathers and still > have a hard time playing a decent game.

???? > Now I am sad, being reminded by myself that I’m actually living in a > military system. > I better watch Bruce Almighty on TV now.

No, that’s your problem right there. TV. Why would you want to be brainwashed by toxic anesthesia? Try Bergman’s "Seventh Seal" instead.

Response:

notmeno wrote: > I bet you guys are something like me. extremely shy and reseverved most of > the time.

No, not me no. =) > Sit back and play Chess and beat idiots most of the time.

Wish I could play more chess! I’m not into playing strangers, though. I don’t know…but chess is one of those games I like against friends…perhaps ’cause it’s so "aggressive"…! And no, I don’t beat idiots ’cause I don’t play them to begin with. > Try to > find out if there are any real challenges left in this world..

ROTFLMAO — try love! As in Erich Fromm’s understanding outlined in "Art of Loving"…and, while you’re at it, Zen meditation and enlightenment, a la Fromm’s "Zen and Psychoanalysis"…and then Krishnamurti’s often-enigmatic "Think on These Things" and "Commentaries on Living" series. Nothing speaks to ignorance so much as boredom and world-weariness (not a dig, mind you; just saying). > Spend > Thousands of dollars on comic collections like I do and try not to be around > people because they IRritate us?

Ah, comic books! I’d love to get back into that again — except other activities like kayaking and parachuting and horseback-riding and tennis and golf and piano practice and bicycling and skiing (the legal kind) and dining out eat up most of my money! > But although we are a special breed we do need some human contact once in a > while so we form relationships and generally they dont work out.

Depends on what we do with them — there are no victims, only volunteers. > I bet that an overwhelming number of lonely people are only children. I > am one.

In a sense, yes, they’re children because they are "immature" — they don’t know how to be by themselves and need constant attention (that they simmer away in isolation doesn’t mean that they don’t need constant attention). > I have a very large Dog his name is Duke and he is my Current > FAmily.

I’d like a dog. But I can’t stand dog hairs and poop! Luckily, there are people. =) > I am rich and do not have to work, in the usual sense.

That’s your first problem. > I am > writing my novel…..

On usenet? =) > Dont be so Lonely my dear. come and see > us…………………………… David

"Loneliness" doesn’t exist.

Response:

In article <6IBdf.496743$tl2.177036@pd7tw3no>, frontierd…@yahoo.com says… – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text ->I bet you guys are something like me. extremely shy and reseverved most of >the time. Sit back and play Chess and beat idiots most of the time. Try to >find out if there are any real challenges left in this world.. Spend >Thousands of dollars on comic collections like I do and try not to be around >people because they IRritate us? >But although we are a special breed we do need some human contact once in a >while so we form relationships and generally they dont work out. > I bet that an overwhelming number of lonely people are only children. I >am one. > I have a very large Dog his name is Duke and he is my Current >FAmily. I am rich and do not have to work, in the usual sense. I am >writing my novel….. > Dont be so Lonely my dear. come and see >us…………………………… David

Being lonely and isolated from the rest – does give you some advantages as such, although you may not regard them as such. You should know this as a writer – being able to be an observer, you can notice things more and see effects down the line, or timeline. Being ‘rich’ can give you an advantage too, if you use it wisely. I would guess you can use it to end your loneliness and probably have? In any number of ways you like to… And if you regard yourself as some intellectual – why not solve the problem of loneliness (and many other problems) in this world? It is only because it is highly focused on materialism and wealth – that it is in the mess it is in. Also how ‘power’ is used and abused. Harvey

Response:

I bet you guys are something like me. extremely shy and reseverved most of the time. Sit back and play Chess and beat idiots most of the time. Try to find out if there are any real challenges left in this world.. Spend Thousands of dollars on comic collections like I do and try not to be around people because they IRritate us? But although we are a special breed we do need some human contact once in a while so we form relationships and generally they dont work out. I bet that an overwhelming number of lonely people are only children. I am one. I have a very large Dog his name is Duke and he is my Current FAmily. I am rich and do not have to work, in the usual sense. I am writing my novel….. Dont be so Lonely my dear. come and see us…………………………… David

Response:

I challenge your theory. We are lonely by choice, whether it be subconcious or not. We are lonely because we are afraid. We are afraid of trusting, hurting, being abused etc. I am an intelligent extrovert. This does not mean I am not lonely. I am not rich, nor do I wish to be so. I know money can’t buy my happiness. I am not impressed by flowers. I am impressed by the honesty and sincerity of people in general. Though that is a very rare quality to find these days. You will find most comedians are very lonely depressed people. There is no blueprint for a lonely person. Wealth, beauty or intelligence doesn’t make you feel any less lonely. — Charm "notmeno" wrote in message

news:6IBdf.496743$tl2.177036@pd7tw3no… – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text ->I bet you guys are something like me. extremely shy and reseverved most of >the time. Sit back and play Chess and beat idiots most of the time. Try to >find out if there are any real challenges left in this world.. Spend >Thousands of dollars on comic collections like I do and try not to be >around people because they IRritate us? > But although we are a special breed we do need some human contact once in > a while so we form relationships and generally they dont work out. > I bet that an overwhelming number of lonely people are only children. I > am one. > I have a very large Dog his name is Duke and he is my Current > FAmily. I am rich and do not have to work, in the usual sense. I am > writing my novel….. > Dont be so Lonely my dear. come and see > us…………………………… David

Response:

Midnight Mass

admin — Wed, 26 Oct 2005 00:00:00 +0000

Question:

The best of all possible worms on 27/10/2005 1:08 pm wrote: >> Loneliness is the privilege of the leisured. I wish I had time to be >> lonely, or to discover that I’m not. > Well, that’s been answered for me. Mum died in hospital at 2pm last > night, local time.

Condolences. From your previous emails I thought there would be more time. I hope it was what they call "peaceful" in the end… I mean painless for her. I’m really sorry to hear that this has happened, no matter how expected it was. Or how prepared you thought you were. I can’t help you with any of this I’m afraid, because I’m one of these people who doesn’t feel very much or very deeply, mostly. I’ve not really had to cope with the death of a loved one. So I’ll leave all that to others who know their stuff. All I can say is, I’m sorry. *** I was having a day of leisure today too and spent it all afternoon with my mum, dad and brother. Partly because I could and because I like them a fair amount, but generally because it was necessary to pick up a china cat. You’re right about mums like that. My mum’s mummish mantra is "As long as you’re all happy, and "settled". "Settled". like we need to be put in position and set in stone, a place for everything and everything in its place. She’s great though, and so’s dad. No matter, or more likely because of, how "comically" [IMO] incensed they get over the government, and GWB, and kids today, and how I’m being treated and how my brother’s getting on alone. It seems to be an extension of how protective they’ve been over the years about me and the others; stifling as it’s felt at times in the past, I’d miss it. I’ll stop rambling. I had a good day today. Sorry to hear yours was at the other end of the scale.

Response:

"The best of all possible worms" (nevilemo…@yahoo.com) writes: > The best of all possible worms wrote: >> Loneliness is the privilege of the leisured. I wish I had time to be >> lonely, or to discover that I’m not. > Well, that’s been answered for me. Mum died in hospital at 2pm last > night, local time.

…………………………… I am not at work today either… F cleaning, F the cold and rain……. Infinite hug…………………………….. ……………………….~~OB~~…. – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> I am not at work today. I care how pissed off this will make people, > but only slightly. > Mostly, I’m like my Dad. We maintain, for this reason, a cautious, > embarrassed, ceremonious non-relationship. We have the same voice, > stature, eyebrows, neuroses, egotistical blind-spots, and predatory > tastes in women. We’re too alike to be at ease together. The genes I > got from my mother are the ones that occasionally complicate and > paralyse the smooth running of the resulting "life" I’ve apparently > had. I’ve gone through it seeing people look surprised: "But what does > your mother think? Doesn’t she mind?" when I’m recounting my latest > stupidity or self-destructive eccentricity. "She doesn’t mind. She only > " (this part always comes out kind of apologetic) "wants me to be > ‘happy’". Mothers like that are apparently rare. I seem to have > inherited this odd, mild preference for seeing people happy rather than > the reverse, coupled with the baseless and rather childish conviction > that everyone is his own best judge of what makes him happy, but it’s > (fortunately) a recessive gene, easily swamped by more urgent > requirements such as sex. Still, it complicates things occasionally. > I’ve been scrupulous about not passing it on. It doesn’t really fit in > with society, or with anything, really. As she didn’t. > Mostly, what persists (me, three sisters, offspring thereof) is an > obstinate, dogged insistence on not trimming feelings to the allowed > categories supplied by novels and soaps: expressed, frequently, in > refusing to talk or say anything, rather than say something simple and > inadequate. And an extremely subtle sense of the humorous absurdity of > just about everything, rarely glimpsed and rarely on cue with the > conversation.

Some of the ast part e thins you still have to find to be your dad;s indluence…;-) But what do I know……. My heart still is stopped right now…..ears falling down my cheeks…. Tried till exaustion, dear friend…So did your mom…….. > She collected objects, some of which were objets, some just whimsical > acquisitions. These were arranged in the same kind of instinctive > furnishing plan that drives my new stepdaughter to line up all her toys > into fortress walls around her bedroom floor. How they were arranged > was a difficult language like that of bees: a dead one, now. The > objects will be scattered around various charity shops in South-east > England. They will keep their patina of nicotine, their unscrubbed, > reassuring, sticky belovedness, for a long time. My mother belonged to > the last generation of people who enjoyed smoking and insisted on doing > so in public, without apology. I shall probably stop now: there’s no > one left on this earth I could enjoy a cigarette "with".

………………………. > She sang too loud in church, or later, wherever communal singing was > called for, and dared to go out dressed in canary yellow dungarees. > This at least is a common attribute of mothers: the embarrassingly > loud, out of date warbling. It seems to develop as naturally as > lactation, friends say. But she never went off key.

That too the you take from your dad;-)……;-) Like me, she also > wanted to explore and be different and out of date, and didn’t care > whether a bird glimpsed in or a feather picked up under a hedge was > collectable or fit to be conversed or written about: nobody but her was > allowed to decide what should interest her. Whoever empties her flat > will find a lot of feathers, a lot of pebbles, a lot of stuff which > wasn’t meant to concern anyone else.

………… > She fabulated about her past, like everyone in the family. I’ve > forgotten most of mine and don’t pretend that what I remember is other > than hopeful fiction with dabs of reality here and there: like her, I > have no coherent "childhood" left to talk about. In her fabulations, > the borders between truth and fiction were constantly shifting: she > didn’t really respect fiction as a category. She wanted to have lived > something more novelesque than memory allowed or supplied: in the end > she did, in her imagination, which people were only allowed to peer > into obliquely on odd occasions.

………………….. > She missed out on the kind of relationships which reconcile people to > social conformity and inflate their self-esteem. In the end, it didn’t > matter: the payback was that there was, finally, no-one around asking > or bribing her to be other than herself, a form of company with which > she was truculently content a lot of the time. I don’t have to > extricate what was really her from what was just habitual polite > deception. It was all really her, and it’s all gone.

……………. There are no words when the most important one of our vocabulary leaves: "mom……….." …I am so so so so so so sorry…………….:( Yet so so so so glad you could go spend time with her and have those moments together…That *she* could too!!! As "a" mo I can say this" it is kayof our kids cry and sob.Yes, we want them to be happy. But not repressed and not carruying the sobs forever inside, exactly *cause* we wat them to be happy! And so say, sir… Your fear of making a child that would bring such sentiments in the world for resembling your mom…. Perhaps you can re-evaluate it…. For the sentiments seem more than just noble, and what this world could use more of…… Like she was the product in part of her own parents genes, she is in yours…. Like she is part of every single cell you are…. -With or without child…. Your mind must be everywhere…… ……………………………………………. so so so s so so so so sorry, OB….:(…………….. ……………………………………………….. …………………………………………. …………………………………………………….. ………………………….. Chloe —

Response:

The best of all possible worms wrote: > Loneliness is the privilege of the leisured. I wish I had time to be > lonely, or to discover that I’m not.

Well, that’s been answered for me. Mum died in hospital at 2pm last night, local time. I am not at work today. I care how pissed off this will make people, but only slightly. Mostly, I’m like my Dad. We maintain, for this reason, a cautious, embarrassed, ceremonious non-relationship. We have the same voice, stature, eyebrows, neuroses, egotistical blind-spots, and predatory tastes in women. We’re too alike to be at ease together. The genes I got from my mother are the ones that occasionally complicate and paralyse the smooth running of the resulting "life" I’ve apparently had. I’ve gone through it seeing people look surprised: "But what does your mother think? Doesn’t she mind?" when I’m recounting my latest stupidity or self-destructive eccentricity. "She doesn’t mind. She only " (this part always comes out kind of apologetic) "wants me to be ‘happy’". Mothers like that are apparently rare. I seem to have inherited this odd, mild preference for seeing people happy rather than the reverse, coupled with the baseless and rather childish conviction that everyone is his own best judge of what makes him happy, but it’s (fortunately) a recessive gene, easily swamped by more urgent requirements such as sex. Still, it complicates things occasionally. I’ve been scrupulous about not passing it on. It doesn’t really fit in with society, or with anything, really. As she didn’t. Mostly, what persists (me, three sisters, offspring thereof) is an obstinate, dogged insistence on not trimming feelings to the allowed categories supplied by novels and soaps: expressed, frequently, in refusing to talk or say anything, rather than say something simple and inadequate. And an extremely subtle sense of the humorous absurdity of just about everything, rarely glimpsed and rarely on cue with the conversation. She collected objects, some of which were objets, some just whimsical acquisitions. These were arranged in the same kind of instinctive furnishing plan that drives my new stepdaughter to line up all her toys into fortress walls around her bedroom floor. How they were arranged was a difficult language like that of bees: a dead one, now. The objects will be scattered around various charity shops in South-east England. They will keep their patina of nicotine, their unscrubbed, reassuring, sticky belovedness, for a long time. My mother belonged to the last generation of people who enjoyed smoking and insisted on doing so in public, without apology. I shall probably stop now: there’s no one left on this earth I could enjoy a cigarette "with". She sang too loud in church, or later, wherever communal singing was called for, and dared to go out dressed in canary yellow dungarees. This at least is a common attribute of mothers: the embarrassingly loud, out of date warbling. It seems to develop as naturally as lactation, friends say. But she never went off key. Like me, she also wanted to explore and be different and out of date, and didn’t care whether a bird glimpsed in or a feather picked up under a hedge was collectable or fit to be conversed or written about: nobody but her was allowed to decide what should interest her. Whoever empties her flat will find a lot of feathers, a lot of pebbles, a lot of stuff which wasn’t meant to concern anyone else. She fabulated about her past, like everyone in the family. I’ve forgotten most of mine and don’t pretend that what I remember is other than hopeful fiction with dabs of reality here and there: like her, I have no coherent "childhood" left to talk about. In her fabulations, the borders between truth and fiction were constantly shifting: she didn’t really respect fiction as a category. She wanted to have lived something more novelesque than memory allowed or supplied: in the end she did, in her imagination, which people were only allowed to peer into obliquely on odd occasions. She missed out on the kind of relationships which reconcile people to social conformity and inflate their self-esteem. In the end, it didn’t matter: the payback was that there was, finally, no-one around asking or bribing her to be other than herself, a form of company with which she was truculently content a lot of the time. I don’t have to extricate what was really her from what was just habitual polite deception. It was all really her, and it’s all gone.

Response:

You are soundlessly flashed out of sleep and, with a slight stumbling sense of tinsel and presents, drugged downstairs and into your wellies. Then into the overstuffed with muttering family car, and off to participate in the ritual. Half way through which you get bored, lose your faith, and have the notion of entertaining yourself. Vaguely wicked things occur between your surprised hands. Then the ritual gets fainter, dribbles and sighs into a vague melchisedech; a doll is shown your unwiped lips, you are bundled back to your Home, crawl back into bed and die. Night time then was always all about Ritual. In Barcelona airport, at a certain hour of night, everyone in the single open overnight cafeteria simultaneously gets out a notepad and paper and starts writing. I saw it. A lady I quite liked the look of also came and sat at my table. It was nice being married and not having to say or try anything. I love all that, always did. The not sleeping, the coffee, the wandering out into the taxi bay for a smoke, the exclusiveness of the not sleeping set all painstakingly ignoring one another under the oasis lights in the terminal corner. By that witching writing hour I’d also got through, bar the last chapter, an interesting sex ‘n’ shagging book by a high-class Barcelona callgirl, smugly empowered by opening her legs into an alternative dimension of yachts and clothes. Of course the book did not do justice to its blurb ("the hidden world of…") but what book ever does these days? bloody blurbs. It did remind me, though, that there are people around who live (according to their lights, which in her case were Habitat) all the time, not just in occasional terrified crannies behind work’s back. I spend my time re-evaluating why I hate my job. At the moment, I consider that the vermilion flycatcher on the phone wires outside represents all wisdom, but amiable as it is, it’s not giving much away. It just sits there, darts around and looks infuriatingly halcyon. I have made a new friend. She is a virgin on a bus. She is dark-haired and has a kind of "I live in a large country house" air about her. Perfect skin, though inappropriately white for the time of year. She appears to be a ventriloquist, since she comes with a glove puppet dummy that looks like a young Mozart. On her head there is a crown so big that if it were made of anything but cardboard it would probably shorten her neck by several inches. She also comes on a kind of silvery mounting, maybe intended to represent a throne. She would probably look kind of stuck-up if it weren’t for the crown and the throne which have the effect of dwarfing her and making her more fragile and well, quite nice and approachable. She is the "Virgen del Cisne", and appears to be a big hit round here. Lucio, who was president around the time I arrived, is currently in jail in Quito. He’d been doing the Dad’s army thing, prodding Ecuador with sinously curling arrows, first from Peru and then from Colombia. The Colombia visit was less than smart, since he had managed to piss off the FARC while in office, and they dumped a fatwa on him, hence Quito and jail. "I’m safer here," he muttered on being shown his cell. Unfortunately, there’s no legal justification for his being in jail beyond a trumped-up treason charge based on his having said, while on tour in the USA, that he was still the President and that people should worship him accordingly (he’s cute like that). There are nine other charges, inc. "being a crap President" and "getting a Peruvian journalist killed", but those require the existence of a Supreme Court to be heard, and Ecuador ain’t got no Supreme Court at the moment. Instead, there is a TV show called "Looking Around for the Ideal Supreme Court" which discusses candidates for the Supreme-Court-to-fill-the-empty-building in a manner disturbingly reminiscent of a Miss World contest (seeing prospective members of the judiciary parading in swimsuits appears to be a very real prospect, way things are going.) The new president, Palacio, is staking everything on a plebiscite intended to allow the setting-up of a "constituent assembly". The idea, as far as I can make out, would be to replace the current democratically elected and universally despised Congress (which is blocking the motion, allowing Palacio to play the enviable role of People’s Representative against the Corrupt Politicians, a corrupt politician’s dream) with something more "of the People". No-one seems too sure how this would work. One "source" said that the Assembly would be only 50% elected, with the other 50% made up of "representatives of civil society", ie thugs of one sort or another. How this would help, I don’t know. The other day I turned on the TV news and watched in stupefaction as what appeared to be a professional TV camera crew (if it was amateur video, it was unusually well done) filmed the lynching of an presumed uxoricide in Esmeraldas. The guy was cornered by a crowd, tried to escape by jumping into a river, was met at the other side by more village folk, dragged out, beaten with sticks, and pushed back into the water half-dead. There was a close-up of a rock hitting the floating head, instantly staining the surrounding water a deeper red. The face of the (female) rock-thrower, moments before, had been pixelised out. Then the (probably dead) body was dragged naked through the streets. The newscaster’s comments were moralistic and gloating: there was no suggestion that perhaps it would have been better to have had, say, a trial first. Put this together with the baying crowds currently marching through Quito and Wirekill, and you’ve got where Ecuador seems to be going right now. Living in a country where a fragile democracy and the rule of law are breaking down before your eyes, to be replaced with stampeding mobs, is quite exhilarating: add to this the current foreign investment exodus, and the fact that we are running out of electricity, and it starts to get troubling. (It’s just been discovered that Ecuador’s generating capacity is inadequate to deal with demand, and that fixing this would require huge investment and hydro dam-building projects which would take 15 years to complete, even assuming someone had the cash. Hence, the country which is about to launch an ad campaign in the US selling itself as an eco-tourists’ paradise is hurriedly dragging in offshore floating generators that have already led to massive air and sea contamination around the Wirekill coastline, "don’t have babies" TV ads, etc. You also get ads all day advising you not to put warm food in the fridge, not to leave lights on. etc. The Wirekill council is planning to phase out street lighting, thus assuring the city its continued reputation as a thieves’ paradise. It’s still a happening place, all told.) I am still pretending to teach Eng Lit and feeling like I’m in freefall, as doing this job for another year is ruled out for mental health reasons, and there’s no alternative yet visible. There is a parrot in my street/alley, a couple of doors away from a shop. I suspect it of being a macaw. When you go to shops in Ecuador, you can’t actually go inside, since they are all fronted by iron bars: you stand in front of them and say "a ver" ("Let’s see") in a plaintive voice, repeating as necessary until someone appears. Then you ask for what you want and they invent a price according to how tall you are and shove whatever at you through the bars. Well, this putative macaw passes the time by saying "a ver" in about sixteen times as many tones of voice, from exasperated to ghostly and sinister to impishly gleeful, as the canniest human impressionist could invent. It also chatters away in what would sound like perfect Spanish, if only you could make out a single word: the syllabification is random, but the intonation is so exactly that of a scolding, rabbitting housewife making her kids’ lives permanently miserable that it’s quite eerie. You only have to relax slightly and your mind will fit words to the tune quite readily: I suspect the Apostles had a parrot like that (cept they pretended it was a pigeon, for reasons best known to themselves). Anyway, this parrot is the soundtrack to my guilty afternoons spent wishing I either did not have work to do, or had done it. I do not have Seven Habits. I do not have Seven Habits, yet I have a wife and stepkids. Is this allowed? Loneliness is the privilege of the leisured. I wish I had time to be lonely, or to discover that I’m not.

Response:

To Darkfalz

admin — Fri, 21 Oct 2005 00:00:00 +0000

Question:

> One of the reasons why I’m officially lonely is that I don’t really get to > meet people on a daily basis anymore. Either through luck or judgement. But > even I have met and "known" many folk. Lessee…

You don’t have a fucking idea what lonely is.

Response:

gargoyl wrote: > Erm, > Ok – I’ve heard of people hacking off dogs tails. My response remains, why > the *&^% would someone do that? > I’m sorry, I may be stupid or misinformed, but that just seems to be > abusive. > -phred

I agree with you; all docking should be illegal, unless it’s for true medical reasons. Breeders around the GB have local difficulties sometimes finding a vet who will chop off the unnecessary* tail, but they’ll always find one that will. Also dog shows like Crufts don’t block entries from docked dogs so, until they do, breeders will continue to cut off tails to "enhance" the breed’s line. That’s what it’s all about… money! Although many breeders say something along the lines that: "A working dog needs to be docked in order for its tail not to become damaged while it’s working, in the good old days it was better to dock at birth than to wait for the tail to become trapped and damaged." Of course you don’t often see a pedigree dog that’s being "shown" doing anything hardier than having a wash and set. *not unnecessary in my book.

Response:

> Darkfalz – look inside yourself. I’m sure that inside there is a person that > a woman WILL love. The challenge, at least for me I think, is being that > person. Bitterness is easy. Change is hard.

The "inside" is the last thing a woman cares about. You have to satisfy all the "outside" things before she’ll care in the least about your "inside".

Response:

Darkfalz wrote: >>One of the reasons why I’m officially lonely is that I don’t really get to >>meet people on a daily basis anymore. Either through luck or judgement. But >>even I have met and "known" many folk. Lessee… > You don’t have a fucking idea what lonely is.

I think I do, so you’ll have to take my word for it. FYI "loneliness" 1. 1. Without companions; lone. 2. Characterized by aloneness; solitary. 2. Unfrequented by people; desolate: a lonely crossroads. 3. 1. Dejected by the awareness of being alone. See Synonyms at alone. 2. Producing such dejection: the loneliest night of the week. My "loneliness" can be found at 1.1 and 1.2 Yours seems to be 3.1 and 3.2 It’s all loneliness, Darkfalz, but if you want to have a "I’m lonlier than you" competition… I’m not playing, sorry.

Response:

Sklenge wrote: > gargoyl on 21/10/2005 3:05 pm wrote: >> LOL… >> Yah know – I should probably just shut up when I haven’t slept in a >> couple of days… > Pfft… I should probably just shut up. Full Stop. But you should be > so lucky.

Zubbenly 1 don’t feel so lonely. >> But seriously – only 100 people?

I don’t think I’ve met or spoken to more than 100 people in my entire life! – Michaela

Response:

Erm, Ok – I’ve heard of people hacking off dogs tails. My response remains, why the *&^% would someone do that? I’m sorry, I may be stupid or misinformed, but that just seems to be abusive. -phred

Response:

On 21-Oct-2005, Sklenge wrote: > gargoyl on 21/10/2005 3:05 pm wrote: > > LOL… > > Yah know – I should probably just shut up when I haven’t slept in a > > couple > > of days… > Pfft… I should probably just shut up. Full Stop. But you should be so > lucky.

Personally I’d rather you not shut up – I enjoy reading your posts… > > But seriously – only 100 people? I think I’ve had that many total > > strangers > > tell me their life stories while riding the bus… I mean what about > > neighbors? The regulars you chat with in bars/stores/McDonald’s? Or meet > > online in places like ASL? > One of the reasons why I’m officially lonely is that I don’t really get to > meet people on a daily basis anymore. Either through luck or judgement.

I have a similar problem. I don’t go clubbing or bar hopping, so the only folks I meet tend to be work related. Since I’m still caught in ‘disability’ limbo (lovely having multiple doctors – ‘you’re fine go back to work’, ‘here sign this disability form’ – drive, don’t drive… blah) I also really have limited access to people. It seems to happen to everyone at some point in our lives. And it kinda sucks. > But > even I have met and "known" many folk. Lessee… > families = 100+ > neighbourhoods = 100+ > schools = 100+ > colleges = 100+ > works = 300+ > casual unsorted = 100+ > I can even name them all if you want ['cept the casual ones], and give you > most of their addresses.

800+ people, I’m impressed you can remember names and details – I’m terrrible with names, though I did many years ago start a list of everyone I ‘knew’… got to long so I went to estimating numbers instead. > So, numbers aren’t a problem it’s the quality not the quantity in the end.

And that’s the rub isn’t it? I’ve met boatloads of people – but not very many that I considered real ‘friends’. I read once that if you’ve had _one_ real friend in life, you’ve been lucky. I’ve been blessed with many people over the years who’ve cared for me in some way or another – but have really only had one true friend, who remains a friend. He, his wife, and their kids remain loving and kind to me despite great hardship on their part. > > I mean I admit that I’ve been casually acquainted with a lot more folks > > than > > is probably normal (happens when you do a lot of public speaking for a > > few > > years…) > How do you do that? I don’t like speaking in front of large groups of > people > much at all. What’s the secret of getting over the nerves?

Ugh – that’s a tough question to answer. I’ve done it more out of inadvertent necessity than because I wanted to. I still get nervous when I have to do an ‘official’ presentation. In my case I actually do better ‘winging’ it and improvising than in following any official presentation or speech. So in that arena, its simply a talent that I was born with. Still can scare the stuffing out of me. One thing that ‘helps’ in my opinion is NOT focussing on anyone in the audience. Its very important to _appear_ that you’re making eye contact with audience members, but if you keep your eyes unfocussed and simply ’scan’ the audience, pausing periodically, it helps. For me, it also helps to be as casual as possible, and to avoid trying to follow any memorized script. But I have problems even with bullet point presentations. It also helps to know your subject extremely well… but that’s pretty obvious I guess. I dunno – I really need to think about this more… – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> > Good golly – there are already a bunch ‘o folks here that I’d be honored > > to > > have as friends… don’t they count…? > > I mean I am talking ‘casually’, not biblically or otherwise intimately > > (though one of my friends in college stopped counting her sex partners > > after > > 100…) > That reminds me of that [gawdawful] Tracee Emmen’s work "All the people > I’ve > slept with". She meant just slept of course, but people thought she meant > boinked, after all that’s what she wanted them to think of course. Just > like > those gawdawful UFKC or wotever t-shirts… I mean if they’re going to be > profane they should at least spell it correctly… anyway it should be > FCGB > [eejits]

Uh – that’s interesting, not familiar with the artist or the ‘work’. Me, I can count on two fingers the number of women I’ve slept with platonically, and Robin was a lesbian… Ann was seriously involved with some guy… > > Ooop – having typed that I must declare myself as officially having > > overstepped and lost it – I really need to sleep…. > nanight. > > gack > > -phred

Beep! -phred

Response:

On 21-Oct-2005, pegasus wrote: > here’s one way: > pick one person out from the crowd, one that appears friendly, relaxed, > smiling, already warm and receptive, and talk to that person as if it’s > yer > best buddy. After a while you’ll have relaxed and you can look around and > start making eye contact with others – c’mon, you’d be a natural with your > soh!

I’ve never tried that – sounds like a really good suggestion. -phred

Response:

- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -On 21-Oct-2005, wrote: > > gargoyl on 21/10/2005 3:05 pm wrote: > >> LOL… > >> Yah know – I should probably just shut up when I haven’t slept in a > >> couple of days… > > Pfft… I should probably just shut up. Full Stop. But you should be > > so lucky. > Zubbenly 1 don’t feel so lonely. > >> But seriously – only 100 people? > I don’t think I’ve met or spoken to more than 100 people in my entire > life! > – Michaela

What!!!??? I find that astonishing. You come across as someone with a very strong sense of self and self confidence, and probably a better public speaker than I am… if I may inquire (as usual flames understood – my email address is real) where did you grow up? In my case, just counting childhood schools, I spoke with more than 100 people… Really curious at this point – I know that my life has been very unusual – and that I have a warped world view as a result. I’d like to learn from the folks here so that I’m less crippled socially. -phred

Response:

Hi Sumire, And thank you – you’re very kind. I do think that DF has been very badly hurt in life – and as you point out – the end result is that we develop a steadily thicker armor skin to protect us against that pain. It doesn’t change that I think that DF, like all of us, is an inherently good person, and one who deserves happiness. We all suffer at times in life, I suspect that DF has suffered more pain than many of us. But again, that doesn’t change that DF deserves a contented life, as we all do. I know that much of what I wrote is possibly painful – a lot of it really amounts to self-reflection. I have a lot of reasons to be bitter about what fate has handed me in life, or at least so I keep being told. And sometimes I am very bitter about the cards fate dealt me. And cliches like ‘when life hands you lemons, make lemonade…’ really annoy me – obnoxious optimism denies the pain that we experience, and our pains our real, emotional and physical. I bear a lot of physical scars – but the emotional pain is far worse in my opinion. And again, I think DF has been burnt. I’d really like to know DF’s story – maybe we here in ASL can help in guiding one another into contented lives, filling the lonely voids that fill many of our hearts. -phred

Response:

By having been away from asl for a while I feel like some continuity has been broken and I feel I will have to catch up with a few new posters like you. Sorry that I have not yet done my homework but I am sure I will learn more about you and Charm and all the new voices in here so that their faces will also emerge from the mists of imagination. I have followed DFs posts for quite a long time and also worried about the pain he is going through. I have also felt fear, honest fear for all that. Yes, the kind of bitterness that DF has developed really makes me feel sad and scared. Against all the troubles I have been through optimism has been a good friend even if it sometimes deserts me for a while. Hopefully you and others do not feel it’s obnoxious. In case it is please give honest feedback. Sumire

Response:

On 22-Oct-2005, "sumire" wrote: > Against all the troubles I have been through > optimism has been a good friend even if it > sometimes deserts me for a while. > Hopefully you and others do not feel it’s > obnoxious. In case it is please give > honest feedback.

I’ve followed your posts and have never found anything you’ve posted obnoxious in any way. Like you, some insane form of optimism has kept me alive over the years, despite life’s travails. I’ve been told that my life has been unusually painful – most recently a psych told me that he thought my life has been filled with painful tragedy, and that my reaction was remarkable. I don’t agree – life is life – what happens happens, and though it may appear that I’ve ’suffered’ more than others, suffering is relative, and everyone’s pain is real. That idealistic optimism is a source of strength I guess. For me, I know intellectually that my humanistic optimism is really irrational based on what I’ve experienced. But it is an inherent part of me. Anyway – I appreciate your posts, and your wisdom. -phred

Response:

Adolf Hitler ist der Sieg.

Response:

- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -gargoyl wrote: > On 22-Oct-2005, "sumire" wrote: > > Against all the troubles I have been through > > optimism has been a good friend even if it > > sometimes deserts me for a while. > > Hopefully you and others do not feel it’s > > obnoxious. In case it is please give > > honest feedback. > I’ve followed your posts and have never found anything you’ve posted > obnoxious in any way. Like you, some insane form of optimism has kept me > alive over the years, despite life’s travails. I’ve been told that my life > has been unusually painful – most recently a psych told me that he thought > my life has been filled with painful tragedy, and that my reaction was > remarkable. > I don’t agree – life is life – what happens happens, and though it may > appear that I’ve ’suffered’ more than others, suffering is relative, and > everyone’s pain is real. > That idealistic optimism is a source of strength I guess. For me, I know > intellectually that my humanistic optimism is really irrational based on > what I’ve experienced. But it is an inherent part of me. > Anyway – I appreciate your posts, and your wisdom. > -phred

Nothing special really. Several girls have hurt me badly, some of them even deliberately (it hurts just as much when it’s not deliberate, but I guess it’s less callous), but I dunno if I have experienced much more pain than your average unhappy, lonely guy. Lots and lots of things about the world, about life, bug me, some to major distraction, but that’s not really pain so much as frustration. It’s the pain of emptiness really. Of time ticking by and having nothing to show for it, of waiting for the inevitable and just wishing that things could have been different, but knowing you can’t go back and fix it and that your future is pretty much set. I just think women are evil, yes evil in a mean, cruel sort of way, and evil in their double standards, but more just petty, stupid, a child-like lack of reason or logic. It seems to me that women have no active conscience, that is, they may feel bad about doing something, but they go and do it anyway. Nothing stops them. They make life a real fucking pain for me, just because they are everywhere, judging me, thinking I’m worthless when they themselves are average as fuck whores. Every woman thinks she’s a model, that she’s special, that she has some magical personality or something that makes her deserve a hunk. This makes them completely unreachable on any level other than looks and money. Anyway, I dunno. It’s a bit much to dredge up and talk about. And I’ve said it all before. I’m pissed off most of the time, and it’s mostly because of women (and Jews and niggers). I can’t change their behaviour, but fuck it, I’m sure as hell going to expose it and talk about it and abuse them for it. For all the good it does.

Response:

>>One of the reasons why I’m officially lonely is that I don’t really get to >>meet people on a daily basis anymore. Either through luck or judgement. > I have a similar problem. I don’t go clubbing or bar hopping, so the only > folks I meet tend to be work related. Since I’m still caught in ‘disability’ > limbo (lovely having multiple doctors – ‘you’re fine go back to work’, ‘here > sign this disability form’ – drive, don’t drive… blah) I also really have > limited access to people. It seems to happen to everyone at some point in > our lives. And it kinda sucks.

It doesn’t bother me, I like the isolation. But you have the inner resources to know you /can/ reach out to others if you want. Right now you’re limited through disability but it sounds like you have some mobility and that it’s likely to get better? Or have I got that bit wrong? You know the "how to" which is more than half the battle. Out of interest, where are your previous work colleagues? Does your old company run any extra-curricular clubs you can invite yourself to? >>But >>even I have met and "known" many folk. Lessee… >>families = 100+ >>neighbourhoods = 100+ >>schools = 100+ >>colleges = 100+ >>works = 300+ >>casual unsorted = 100+ >>I can even name them all if you want ['cept the casual ones], and give you >>most of their addresses. > 800+ people, I’m impressed you can remember names and details – I’m > terrrible with names, though I did many years ago start a list of everyone I > ‘knew’… got to long so I went to estimating numbers instead.

I’m not so good about remembering names on first introduction nowadays but, once you’re logged IRL you’re there for good [current brain health permitting], however I still have trouble remembering names on-line. >>So, numbers aren’t a problem it’s the quality not the quantity in the end. > And that’s the rub isn’t it? I’ve met boatloads of people – but not very > many that I considered real ‘friends’. I read once that if you’ve had _one_ > real friend in life, you’ve been lucky. I’ve been blessed with many people > over the years who’ve cared for me in some way or another – but have really > only had one true friend, who remains a friend. He, his wife, and their kids > remain loving and kind to me despite great hardship on their part.

There you go then. That’s what matters. Having one or two friends who know you well enough to tell you the truth or to just sit and chat with or remain silent with is great. What more would you want? It would be terribly hard to keep up that level of intimacy with the boatloads of people you’ve ever met. Possessiveness comes into it I think. – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text ->>>I mean I admit that I’ve been casually acquainted with a lot more folks >>>than >>>is probably normal (happens when you do a lot of public speaking for a >>>few >>>years…) >>How do you do that? I don’t like speaking in front of large groups of >>people >>much at all. What’s the secret of getting over the nerves? > Ugh – that’s a tough question to answer. I’ve done it more out of > inadvertent necessity than because I wanted to. I still get nervous when I > have to do an ‘official’ presentation. In my case I actually do better > ‘winging’ it and improvising than in following any official presentation or > speech. So in that arena, its simply a talent that I was born with. Still > can scare the stuffing out of me. > One thing that ‘helps’ in my opinion is NOT focussing on anyone in the > audience. Its very important to _appear_ that you’re making eye contact with > audience members, but if you keep your eyes unfocussed and simply ’scan’ the > audience, pausing periodically, it helps. > For me, it also helps to be as casual as possible, and to avoid trying to > follow any memorized script. But I have problems even with bullet point > presentations. > It also helps to know your subject extremely well… but that’s pretty > obvious I guess. > I dunno – I really need to think about this more…

All that is helpful info. It might come in, but I try to ensure I’m never asked to speak to groups… which is how I deal with it. – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> >> Good golly – there are already a bunch ‘o folks here that I’d be >>> honored to have as friends… don’t they count…? >>>I mean I am talking ‘casually’, not biblically or otherwise intimately >>>(though one of my friends in college stopped counting her sex partners >>>after 100…) >> That reminds me of that [gawdawful] Tracee Emmen’s work "All the >> people I’ve slept with". She meant just slept of course, but people >> thought she meant boinked, after all that’s what she wanted them to >> think of course. > Uh – that’s interesting, not familiar with the artist or the ‘work’. Me, I > can count on two fingers the number of women I’ve slept with platonically, > and Robin was a lesbian… Ann was seriously involved with some guy…

I’ve /slept/ with many people. Quick count up: 100 ish, if you include the times I’ve slept in a dormitory or same room situation. I’m surprised you’ve only slept with two women… how many men have you slept with?

Response:

Hi Phred, I wish your lines get through to DF, that they really reach him as his armour is quite thick. And yet I do not know whether he will like what you have written. Just wanted to tell you that I like it. Hope you have had some regenerating sleep in the meantime and wish you are recreating further from your throat thingie. Take care Sumire

Response:

Good god are you implying that people actually hack off cat tails? Why the *&^% would someone do that? I’ve got to be misunderstanding where this thread has gone… -phred

Response:

gargoyl on 21/10/2005 3:08 pm wrote: > Good god are you implying that people actually hack off cat tails? Why the > *&^% would someone do that?

I really meant dogs at that point. – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> I’ve got to be misunderstanding where this thread has gone… > -phred

Response:

gargoyl on 21/10/2005 3:05 pm wrote: > LOL… > Yah know – I should probably just shut up when I haven’t slept in a couple > of days…

Pfft… I should probably just shut up. Full Stop. But you should be so lucky. > But seriously – only 100 people? I think I’ve had that many total strangers > tell me their life stories while riding the bus… I mean what about > neighbors? The regulars you chat with in bars/stores/McDonald’s? Or meet > online in places like ASL?

One of the reasons why I’m officially lonely is that I don’t really get to meet people on a daily basis anymore. Either through luck or judgement. But even I have met and "known" many folk. Lessee… families = 100+ neighbourhoods = 100+ schools = 100+ colleges = 100+ works = 300+ casual unsorted = 100+ I can even name them all if you want ['cept the casual ones], and give you most of their addresses. So, numbers aren’t a problem it’s the quality not the quantity in the end. > I mean I admit that I’ve been casually acquainted with a lot more folks than > is probably normal (happens when you do a lot of public speaking for a few > years…)

How do you do that? I don’t like speaking in front of large groups of people much at all. What’s the secret of getting over the nerves? > Good golly – there are already a bunch ‘o folks here that I’d be honored to > have as friends… don’t they count…? > I mean I am talking ‘casually’, not biblically or otherwise intimately > (though one of my friends in college stopped counting her sex partners after > 100…)

That reminds me of that [gawdawful] Tracee Emmen’s work "All the people I’ve slept with". She meant just slept of course, but people thought she meant boinked, after all that’s what she wanted them to think of course. Just like those gawdawful UFKC or wotever t-shirts… I mean if they’re going to be profane they should at least spell it correctly… anyway it should be FCGB [eejits] > Ooop – having typed that I must declare myself as officially having > overstepped and lost it – I really need to sleep….

nanight. – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> gack > -phred

Response:

LOL… Yah know – I should probably just shut up when I haven’t slept in a couple of days… But seriously – only 100 people? I think I’ve had that many total strangers tell me their life stories while riding the bus… I mean what about neighbors? The regulars you chat with in bars/stores/McDonald’s? Or meet online in places like ASL? I mean I admit that I’ve been casually acquainted with a lot more folks than is probably normal (happens when you do a lot of public speaking for a few years…) Good golly – there are already a bunch ‘o folks here that I’d be honored to have as friends… don’t they count…? I mean I am talking ‘casually’, not biblically or otherwise intimately (though one of my friends in college stopped counting her sex partners after 100…) Ooop – having typed that I must declare myself as officially having overstepped and lost it – I really need to sleep…. gack -phred

Response:

paneon on 21/10/2005 12:48 pm wrote: – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text ->>> Point taken – I’m psychologically incapable of trusting anyone without a >>> tail IRL. Blame the lecherous clergy, abusive family unit, or the hive-mind >>> peer-groups as you will… >> What about those cute little manx cat kittens? >> http://www.manxscenes.com/01&2/June/Manx%20Cat.htm >> http://images.google.co.uk/images?hl=en&ie=ISO-8859-1&q=manx+kitten&s… >> =wi > (Uh well – I’ve never really had much to do with cats. Me thinks it’s > because they’re almost human. Tail-less cats? Well I suppose they’re ok as > long as there’s no docking involved. > (-paneon)

No, they’re naturally tail free [cute though]. I prefer cats /with/ tails but beggars can’t be choosers. I’m a member of the anti-dock league also. Docking things should be left to the dockers union [contradiction in terms it seems]. So, what creatures with tails do you trust? Horses? Kangaroos? Squonks? I don’t think I could take to a furless cat.

Response:

>> Point taken – I’m psychologically incapable of trusting anyone without a >> tail IRL. Blame the lecherous clergy, abusive family unit, or the >> hive-mind >> peer-groups as you will… > What about those cute little manx cat kittens? > http://www.manxscenes.com/01&2/June/Manx%20Cat.htm > http://images.google.co.uk/images?hl=en&ie=ISO-8859-1&q=manx+kitten&s… > =wi

(Uh well – I’ve never really had much to do with cats. Me thinks it’s because they’re almost human. Tail-less cats? Well I suppose they’re ok as long as there’s no docking involved. (-paneon)

Response:

paneon on 21/10/2005 12:25 pm wrote: – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text ->> Hi Darkfalz, >> I’ve read a lot of your posts tonight. And I’ve read those I’ve found in >> the >> past, since I’ve joined this group. I admit I’m a newbie here, but choose >> again to be arrogant perhaps, and make some observations. > You’ve actually read Darkfalz? God bless! Let me make some observations of > my own… >> I’ve known a lot of people in my life – professionally and as ‘friends’ – >> for myriad reasons. When I last counted I knew (this was some ten or >> fifteen >> years ago), the estimate had hit some ten THOUSAND people that I had >> interacted with on a level beyond ‘would you like fries with that’ kind of >> thing (do the math folks – you’ll be REALLY surprised how many people you >> know at least casually). > Well – if I was wildly optimistic, I’d say 20 (family) + 20 (primary school) > + 20 (high school) + 20 (uni) + 20 (work) = 100. > Right… > <# begin completely non-applicable section #> >> Anyway – I can understand being bitter about life, and about romance in >> particular. All my relationships have ended badly, except one – and that >> was >> an FTF ex from high school who eventually got married (ended the whole >> thing… no F and no TF… was afraid her husband would find out she >> wasn’t >> a virgin). >> Gack I need to sleep at some point. >> Anyway anyway… you’re right some people, men and women of all sexual >> preferences obsess over appearance. And I think that our sensual >> experience >> (remember, there are blind folks out there… and there not as ‘crippled’ >> as >> you’d think in their senses…) is a key initial attractor in finding a >> mate. >> But that isn’t a ‘fatal’ issue – it simply seems to be an excuse for a lot >> of us (myself included). I’m not physically attractive is a great excuse >> for >> our romantic failures. Hell – I’m no Pierce Brosnan (dating myself there – >> loved Remington Steele as a kid), but I’ve NEVER had trouble ‘getting >> laid’. >> And this is where attitude comes in… I’ve NEVER been interested in >> ‘getting laid’. I’ve turned down more people (women AND men) than I’ve >> actually slept with. >> I have intimate relations with women that I LOVE. That I care about. That >> matter to me. The ones that I WANT to wake up next to, to talk with, >> really >> the ones I want to listen to. >> Anyone can find a sex partner. Fuck, lets face it, a lot of traditional >> ‘dating’ is some formalized form of fucked up prostitution. Guy pays for >> the >> dinner and a play, gets a bj. I thought that was lame in junior high. >> Frankly I’d rather jack off than deal with bullshit like that today. > <# end completely non-applicable section #> > Right…Lead balloon? >> We each need to look inside ourselves… therein lies the key to our >> loneliness. The key to why we’re here instead of cuddling up with a >> special >> someone, watching Titanic and smooching. >> I know that one reason I’m here is that I fucked up. I made mistakes. I >> made >> bad choices. I picked the wrong women. Yeah, it wasn’t all my fault, but >> some of it was. > Point taken – I’m psychologically incapable of trusting anyone without a > tail IRL. Blame the lecherous clergy, abusive family unit, or the hive-mind > peer-groups as you will…

What about those cute little manx cat kittens? http://www.manxscenes.com/01&2/June/Manx%20Cat.htm http://images.google.co.uk/images?hl=en&ie=ISO-8859-1&q=manx+kitten&s… =wi – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text ->> Darkfalz – look inside yourself. I’m sure that inside there is a person >> that >> a woman WILL love. The challenge, at least for me I think, is being that >> person. Bitterness is easy. Change is hard. >> Peace – and flames understood – if you want to make it personal, my email >> is >> real. > -paneon > (Well, I’ve been a goddamned rude individual now haven’t I -poking my nose > into someone else’s discussion….)

I don’t even read them when they’re not individually addressed to me.

Response:

> Hi Darkfalz, > I’ve read a lot of your posts tonight. And I’ve read those I’ve found in > the > past, since I’ve joined this group. I admit I’m a newbie here, but choose > again to be arrogant perhaps, and make some observations.

You’ve actually read Darkfalz? God bless! Let me make some observations of my own… > I’ve known a lot of people in my life – professionally and as ‘friends’ – > for myriad reasons. When I last counted I knew (this was some ten or > fifteen > years ago), the estimate had hit some ten THOUSAND people that I had > interacted with on a level beyond ‘would you like fries with that’ kind of > thing (do the math folks – you’ll be REALLY surprised how many people you > know at least casually).

Well – if I was wildly optimistic, I’d say 20 (family) + 20 (primary school) + 20 (high school) + 20 (uni) + 20 (work) = 100. Right… <# begin completely non-applicable section #> – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> Anyway – I can understand being bitter about life, and about romance in > particular. All my relationships have ended badly, except one – and that > was > an FTF ex from high school who eventually got married (ended the whole > thing… no F and no TF… was afraid her husband would find out she > wasn’t > a virgin). > Gack I need to sleep at some point. > Anyway anyway… you’re right some people, men and women of all sexual > preferences obsess over appearance. And I think that our sensual > experience > (remember, there are blind folks out there… and there not as ‘crippled’ > as > you’d think in their senses…) is a key initial attractor in finding a > mate. > But that isn’t a ‘fatal’ issue – it simply seems to be an excuse for a lot > of us (myself included). I’m not physically attractive is a great excuse > for > our romantic failures. Hell – I’m no Pierce Brosnan (dating myself there – > loved Remington Steele as a kid), but I’ve NEVER had trouble ‘getting > laid’. > And this is where attitude comes in… I’ve NEVER been interested in > ‘getting laid’. I’ve turned down more people (women AND men) than I’ve > actually slept with. > I have intimate relations with women that I LOVE. That I care about. That > matter to me. The ones that I WANT to wake up next to, to talk with, > really > the ones I want to listen to. > Anyone can find a sex partner. Fuck, lets face it, a lot of traditional > ‘dating’ is some formalized form of fucked up prostitution. Guy pays for > the > dinner and a play, gets a bj. I thought that was lame in junior high. > Frankly I’d rather jack off than deal with bullshit like that today.

<# end completely non-applicable section #> Right…Lead balloon? > We each need to look inside ourselves… therein lies the key to our > loneliness. The key to why we’re here instead of cuddling up with a > special > someone, watching Titanic and smooching. > I know that one reason I’m here is that I fucked up. I made mistakes. I > made > bad choices. I picked the wrong women. Yeah, it wasn’t all my fault, but > some of it was.

Point taken – I’m psychologically incapable of trusting anyone without a tail IRL. Blame the lecherous clergy, abusive family unit, or the hive-mind peer-groups as you will… > Darkfalz – look inside yourself. I’m sure that inside there is a person > that > a woman WILL love. The challenge, at least for me I think, is being that > person. Bitterness is easy. Change is hard. > Peace – and flames understood – if you want to make it personal, my email > is > real.

-paneon (Well, I’ve been a goddamned rude individual now haven’t I -poking my nose into someone else’s discussion….)

Response:

Hi Darkfalz, I’ve read a lot of your posts tonight. And I’ve read those I’ve found in the past, since I’ve joined this group. I admit I’m a newbie here, but choose again to be arrogant perhaps, and make some observations. I’ve known a lot of people in my life – professionally and as ‘friends’ – for myriad reasons. When I last counted I knew (this was some ten or fifteen years ago), the estimate had hit some ten THOUSAND people that I had interacted with on a level beyond ‘would you like fries with that’ kind of thing (do the math folks – you’ll be REALLY surprised how many people you know at least casually). Anyway – I can understand being bitter about life, and about romance in particular. All my relationships have ended badly, except one – and that was an FTF ex from high school who eventually got married (ended the whole thing… no F and no TF… was afraid her husband would find out she wasn’t a virgin). Gack I need to sleep at some point. Anyway anyway… you’re right some people, men and women of all sexual preferences obsess over appearance. And I think that our sensual experience (remember, there are blind folks out there… and there not as ‘crippled’ as you’d think in their senses…) is a key initial attractor in finding a mate. But that isn’t a ‘fatal’ issue – it simply seems to be an excuse for a lot of us (myself included). I’m not physically attractive is a great excuse for our romantic failures. Hell – I’m no Pierce Brosnan (dating myself there – loved Remington Steele as a kid), but I’ve NEVER had trouble ‘getting laid’. And this is where attitude comes in… I’ve NEVER been interested in ‘getting laid’. I’ve turned down more people (women AND men) than I’ve actually slept with. I have intimate relations with women that I LOVE. That I care about. That matter to me. The ones that I WANT to wake up next to, to talk with, really the ones I want to listen to. Anyone can find a sex partner. Fuck, lets face it, a lot of traditional ‘dating’ is some formalized form of fucked up prostitution. Guy pays for the dinner and a play, gets a bj. I thought that was lame in junior high. Frankly I’d rather jack off than deal with bullshit like that today. We each need to look inside ourselves… therein lies the key to our loneliness. The key to why we’re here instead of cuddling up with a special someone, watching Titanic and smooching. I know that one reason I’m here is that I fucked up. I made mistakes. I made bad choices. I picked the wrong women. Yeah, it wasn’t all my fault, but some of it was. Darkfalz – look inside yourself. I’m sure that inside there is a person that a woman WILL love. The challenge, at least for me I think, is being that person. Bitterness is easy. Change is hard. Peace – and flames understood – if you want to make it personal, my email is real. -phred

Response:

So, what are you reading these days?

admin — Tue, 20 Sep 2005 00:00:00 +0000

Question:

Why do you apologize for quoting a great piece of insight? You asked what we were reading these days? I do a lot of parallel reading. So my current two books I absolutely enjoy are: Haruki Murakami: "Umibe no Kafuka" (That’s the Japanese title, I read it of course in German: "Kafka am Strand" (=Kafka on the Beach, but I think there is a better English translation of the title) – anyway, a very recommendable book. A bit crazy and deeply wise. Second is another favourite: A.L. Kennedy: All That You Need. Both books marginally deal with loneliness. All great art ist bound to the solitary I’ll put Douglas Coupland on my to-do list. Thanks, Paneon. Sumi "Where does loneliness come from? I’d hazard a guess that the crapshoot that is family has more than a little to do with it—father’s a drunk; mother’s an agoraphobic; single child; middle child; firstborn; mother’s a nag; father’s a golf cheat… I mean, what’s your own nature/nurture crap-shoot? You’re here. You’re reading these words. Is this a coincidence? Maybe you think fate is only for others. Maybe you’re ashamed to be reading about loneliness— maybe someone will catch you and then they’ll know your secret stain. And then maybe you’re not even sure what loneliness is— that’s common. We cripple our children for life by not telling them what loneliness is, all of its shades, and tones and implications. When it clubs us on the head, usually just after we leave home, we’re blindsided. We have no idea what hit us. We think we’re diseased, schizoid, bipolar, monstrous and lacking in dietary chromium. It takes us until thirty to figure out what it was that sucked the joy from our youth, that made our brains shriek and burn on the inside, even while our exteriors made us seem as confident and bronzed as Qantas pilots. Loneliness." pg 9-10.

Response:

> Why do you apologize for quoting a great piece of insight?

Well… I suppose I was a bit worried that it could be misread as ‘people under 18 or over 30 don’t get lonely’. I know, I know… I’m a hopeless neurotic… – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> You asked what we were reading these days? > I do a lot of parallel reading. So my current > two books I absolutely enjoy are: > Haruki Murakami: "Umibe no Kafuka" (That’s the Japanese title, I read it > of course in German: "Kafka am Strand" (=Kafka on the Beach, but I > think there is a better English translation of > the title) – anyway, a very recommendable book. > A bit crazy and deeply wise. > Second is another favourite: A.L. Kennedy: All That You Need. > Both books marginally deal with loneliness. > All great art ist bound to the solitary > I’ll put Douglas Coupland on my to-do list. > Thanks, Paneon. > Sumi

Well, I’d probably describe Douglas Coupland as more focussed on writing novels that are entertaining (and crazy) rather than enlightened discussions of the human condition, even though that quote was fairly bang on the money. Kafka am Strand? I’ve heard the title – but I’ve become a bit wary of Kafka since I read ‘The Trial’. (Excellent book, just very draining to read.) I’ll try and remember to hunt this down when I’ve got a bit more time on the holidays for reading literature a little more heavy than my usual fare.

Response:

paneon on 20/09/2005 8:36 am wrote: – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> Crashed with a book when I got home today – got washing to do, dinner to > cook, dog to walk, personal hygiene to maintain, sleep to… uh… sleep – > but just too wrecked to do anything much just yet. > – Book? > Douglas Coupland – ‘Eleanor Rigby’. No prizes for guessing basic content, or > why I swiped it off the shelf at the library. I haven’t read much Coupland, > but I’m starting to really enjoy his work. > – Quotable bit? > "Where does loneliness come from? I’d hazard a guess that the crapshoot that > is family has more than a little to do with it—father’s a drunk; mother’s > an agoraphobic; single child; middle child; firstborn; mother’s a nag; > father’s a golf cheat… I mean, what’s your own nature/nurture crap-shoot? > You’re here. You’re reading these words. Is this a coincidence? Maybe you > think fate is only for others. Maybe you’re ashamed to be reading about > loneliness— maybe someone will catch you and then they’ll know your secret > stain. And then maybe you’re not even sure what loneliness is— that’s > common. We cripple our children for life by not telling them what loneliness > is, all of its shades, and tones and implications. When it clubs us on the > head, usually just after we leave home, we’re blindsided. We have no idea > what hit us. We think we’re diseased, schizoid, bipolar, monstrous and > lacking in dietary chromium. It takes us until thirty to figure out what it > was that sucked the joy from our youth, that made our brains shriek and burn > on the inside, even while our exteriors made us seem as confident and > bronzed as Qantas pilots. Loneliness." pg 9-10. > Apologies if relevant, or not, as the case may be… > – paneon

I’m reading "The Turn of the Screw" – Henry James, "Electric Universe" – David Bodanis and attempting "The Edges of Science" – Richard Morris I don’t think these are relevant though.

Response:

210905 wrote in news:BF572DEA.3A1F% my_unstable_Ost…@excite.com: > I’m reading "The Turn of the Screw" – Henry James,

There’s no need for masochism. — "You tried to scan me, you freaked-out maniac." –TV’s Frank.

Response:

Te he he …

Response:

>> I’m reading "The Turn of the Screw" – Henry James, > There’s no need for masochism.

It seems to involve an impressionable governess who has the unrequited hots for her distant yet beguiling master. Meanwhile she becomes dominated by her young, manipulative charges. I’m, only so far and, already, I’m getting comma, fatigue, large. Gawd knows when this screw is going to get turned. [no offence to H James or fans of said author].

Response:

I’m reading tabloids and gossip magazines.

Response:

> I’m reading tabloids and gossip magazines.

Do these come with words these days? I thought most people just purchase them to look at the pictures. *ducks*

Response:

- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -"paneon" (paneon@sdf_dot_lonestar.org) writes: > Crashed with a book when I got home today – got washing to do, dinner to > cook, dog to walk, personal hygiene to maintain, sleep to… uh… sleep – > but just too wrecked to do anything much just yet. > – Book? > Douglas Coupland – ‘Eleanor Rigby’. No prizes for guessing basic content, or > why I swiped it off the shelf at the library. I haven’t read much Coupland, > but I’m starting to really enjoy his work. > – Quotable bit? > "Where does loneliness come from? I’d hazard a guess that the crapshoot that > is family has more than a little to do with it—father’s a drunk; mother’s > an agoraphobic; single child; middle child; firstborn; mother’s a nag; > father’s a golf cheat… I mean, what’s your own nature/nurture crap-shoot? > You’re here. You’re reading these words. Is this a coincidence? Maybe you > think fate is only for others. Maybe you’re ashamed to be reading about > loneliness— maybe someone will catch you and then they’ll know your secret > stain. And then maybe you’re not even sure what loneliness is— that’s > common. We cripple our children for life by not telling them what loneliness > is, all of its shades, and tones and implications. When it clubs us on the > head, usually just after we leave home, we’re blindsided. We have no idea > what hit us. We think we’re diseased, schizoid, bipolar, monstrous and > lacking in dietary chromium. It takes us until thirty to figure out what it > was that sucked the joy from our youth, that made our brains shriek and burn > on the inside, even while our exteriors made us seem as confident and > bronzed as Qantas pilots. Loneliness." pg 9-10. > Apologies if relevant, or not, as the case may be… > – paneon

Sure sounds relevant to me!:) —

Response:

Crashed with a book when I got home today – got washing to do, dinner to cook, dog to walk, personal hygiene to maintain, sleep to… uh… sleep – but just too wrecked to do anything much just yet. – Book? Douglas Coupland – ‘Eleanor Rigby’. No prizes for guessing basic content, or why I swiped it off the shelf at the library. I haven’t read much Coupland, but I’m starting to really enjoy his work. – Quotable bit? "Where does loneliness come from? I’d hazard a guess that the crapshoot that is family has more than a little to do with it—father’s a drunk; mother’s an agoraphobic; single child; middle child; firstborn; mother’s a nag; father’s a golf cheat… I mean, what’s your own nature/nurture crap-shoot? You’re here. You’re reading these words. Is this a coincidence? Maybe you think fate is only for others. Maybe you’re ashamed to be reading about loneliness— maybe someone will catch you and then they’ll know your secret stain. And then maybe you’re not even sure what loneliness is— that’s common. We cripple our children for life by not telling them what loneliness is, all of its shades, and tones and implications. When it clubs us on the head, usually just after we leave home, we’re blindsided. We have no idea what hit us. We think we’re diseased, schizoid, bipolar, monstrous and lacking in dietary chromium. It takes us until thirty to figure out what it was that sucked the joy from our youth, that made our brains shriek and burn on the inside, even while our exteriors made us seem as confident and bronzed as Qantas pilots. Loneliness." pg 9-10. Apologies if relevant, or not, as the case may be… – paneon

Response:

I WILL BE LONELY

admin — Mon, 12 Sep 2005 00:00:00 +0000

Question:

in 8.17 seconds , and … where will you be ?

Response:

"%" wrote in message

news:10e759dhbcgskbb@corp.supernews.com… > in 8.17 seconds , and … where will you be ?

Australia.

Response:

"Victor" wrote in news:40e3fad6$0$24758$5a62ac22@per- qv1-newsreader-01.iinet.net.au: > "%" wrote in message > news:10e759dhbcgskbb@corp.supernews.com… >> in 8.17 seconds , and … where will you be ? > Australia.

America. And PROUD of it! "People who use words like ‘truth’ and ‘justice’!" "Good words! DAMN good words!" –the married couple in High Plains Drifter. — "So what’s it like being Jewish?" "What’s it like being human?" "Well it’s no cake-walk." (Hill Street Blues)

Response:

in 8.3 seconds

Response:

In article , Pers…@gmail.com says… >in 8.3 seconds

Do something, to keep your mind off it. You have to be able to live by yourself, if that is the case. Otherwise get a permanent roommate/flatmate/etc. Harvey

Response:

"Your Name Here=Harvey" wrote in message news:dg5g52$njd$1@lust.ihug.co.nz… – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> In article , Pers…@gmail.com says… > >in 8.3 seconds > Do something, to keep your mind off it. > You have to be able to live by yourself, if that is the case. > Otherwise get a permanent roommate/flatmate/etc. > Harvey

i showed this to my wife and she giggled loneliness doesn’t always equate to a need for another person to be present

Response:

In article , Pers…@gmail.com says… – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text ->"Your Name Here=Harvey" wrote in message >news:dg5g52$njd$1@lust.ihug.co.nz… >> In article , Pers…@gmail.com says… >> >in 8.3 seconds >> Do something, to keep your mind off it. >> You have to be able to live by yourself, if that is the case. >> Otherwise get a permanent roommate/flatmate/etc. >> Harvey >i showed this to my wife and she giggled >loneliness doesn’t always equate to a need for another person to be present

Well, I do not know your personal circumstances, and only presumed the typical lonely guy situation – which was in error. Please update me, on your situation – what is it, and how come you are ‘lonely’? Harvey

Response:

"Your Name Here=Harvey" wrote in message news:dg7iqh$ipu$1@lust.ihug.co.nz… – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> In article , Pers…@gmail.com says… > >"Your Name Here=Harvey" wrote in message > >news:dg5g52$njd$1@lust.ihug.co.nz… > >> In article , Pers…@gmail.com says… > >> >in 8.3 seconds > >> Do something, to keep your mind off it. > >> You have to be able to live by yourself, if that is the case. > >> Otherwise get a permanent roommate/flatmate/etc. > >> Harvey > >i showed this to my wife and she giggled > >loneliness doesn’t always equate to a need for another person to be present > Well, I do not know your personal circumstances, and only presumed > the typical lonely guy situation – which was in error. > Please update me, on your situation – what is it, and how come you are > ‘lonely’? > Harvey

it doesn’t matter now its passed

Response:

how to cry

admin — Sat, 03 Sep 2005 00:00:00 +0000

Question:

i used to be able to cry when i drink but now i couldn’t drink, i do not know how to cry, though the urge is there i’m generally a loner, have few good friends. but terribly lonely, wishing to care so much for somebody

Response:

"Nick Chan" (zzzxtr…@yahoo.com) writes: > i used to be able to cry when i drink > but now i couldn’t drink, i do not know how to cry, though the urge is > there > i’m generally a loner, have few good friends. but terribly lonely, > wishing to care so much for somebody

Hi, Given that there are so many persons on this planet looking for someone to care about them, I take it that you meant that you are wishing so much that someone ""special"" was there where you both ared for each other in a loveship way….? Welcome to the bunch, Not everyoen in here is lonely as in "Longing for a mate", if many or maybe most are. Hope that you can find company or distraction on the ng from your loneliness, on your journey to finding soemone special to live caring with! C —

Response:

blessings from above

admin — Thu, 25 Aug 2005 00:00:00 +0000

Question:

When I was walking into town this morning, as I passed under a tree a huge load of black excrement landed on my head, some splashing down onto my white skirt and blouse. "Oh yuk!!! What *was* that?" I exclaimed, looking up into the leafy branches to try and spot the culprit. A couple coming the other way stopped to commiserate. "I think it was a bird", the woman offered helpfully. Hmm… despite the volume and colour, I hadn’t really thought it might be an elephant up there, surprisingly. "There’s some on your …" she gestured at my right boob, where I now had a big black nipple. I grinned. "Think I’d better go home and change." They smiled back apologetically, clearly wanting to help but recognising there was little they could do. On the way home again I met one of my neighbours going the other way. We swapped greetings in passing, and I watched with amusement as her eyes were drawn magnetically to my chest but old-fashioned courtesy kept her from comment — For more information about this NNTP posting service, contact: h…@asarian-host.net — for all info about our server. If you want an anonymous account, visit our sign-up page: https://asarian-host.net/cgi-bin/signup.cgi

Response:

pegasus wrote: > When I was walking into town this morning, as I passed under a tree a huge > load of black excrement landed on my head, some splashing down onto my white > skirt and blouse. "Oh yuk!!! What *was* that?" I exclaimed, looking up > into the leafy branches to try and spot the culprit. A couple coming the > other way stopped to commiserate. "I think it was a bird", the woman > offered helpfully. Hmm… despite the volume and colour, I hadn’t really > thought it might be an elephant up there, surprisingly. "There’s some on > your …" she gestured at my right boob, where I now had a big black nipple. > I grinned. "Think I’d better go home and change." They smiled back > apologetically, clearly wanting to help but recognising there was little > they could do. On the way home again I met one of my neighbours going the > other way. We swapped greetings in passing, and I watched with amusement as > her eyes were drawn magnetically to my chest but old-fashioned courtesy kept > her from comment

I had a very coarse remark to put in here but it’s way too coarse for ASL. Watch out, it’s blackberry season that stuff will stain!

Response:

Black bird excrement? Interesting. So far I have had only white one. I could take you have removed it in the meantime. Some side effect of bird excrement: Lots of plants in my garden from seeds contained in birdshit have grown in the most impossible places. E.g. a vine amidst my rose bushes. Sumi

Response:

"sumire" wrote in message

news:24820d1120d3fe6da12aab9db852cc82@localhost.talkaboutsupport.com… > Black bird excrement? Interesting. > So far I have had only white one. > I could take you have removed it > in the meantime. > Some side effect of bird excrement: > Lots of plants in my garden > from seeds contained in birdshit > have grown in the most impossible > places. E.g. a vine amidst my rose bushes. > Sumi

Hi Sumi I was very surprised that it did wash out. As Thursday intimated, the colour of birdpoop is affected by diet. So this vine in your garden – does it grow decent grapes? Do you make your own wine? I tried once or twice with the grapes from the vine here, but it was way too dry for my taste. — For more information about this NNTP posting service, contact: h…@asarian-host.net — for all info about our server. If you want an anonymous account, visit our sign-up page: https://asarian-host.net/cgi-bin/signup.cgi

Response:

- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -pegasus wrote: > "sumire" wrote in message > news:24820d1120d3fe6da12aab9db852cc82@localhost.talkaboutsupport.com… >>Black bird excrement? Interesting. >>So far I have had only white one. >>I could take you have removed it >>in the meantime. >>Some side effect of bird excrement: >>Lots of plants in my garden >>from seeds contained in birdshit >>have grown in the most impossible >>places. E.g. a vine amidst my rose bushes. >>Sumi > Hi Sumi > I was very surprised that it did wash out. As Thursday intimated, the > colour of birdpoop is affected by diet. > So this vine in your garden – does it grow decent grapes? Do you make your > own wine? I tried once or twice with the grapes from the vine here, but it > was way too dry for my taste.

Hang on. Are you saying you’ve got a vine? And Sumire’s got a vine? Hey! I’ve got a vine too! That’s so weird all three of us unconnected people having a vine. Does anyone else in ASL have a vine? Is this an ASL thing or just a lonely woman thing? I thought lonely women had cats. We made some wine from our vine it tastes divine. Well it doesn’ atchly it tastes really sweet like port but if you like port a bit it could be considered divine. "Rubbish" doesn’t rhyme with wine of vine.

Response:

poet wrote: > X-No-Archive: yes > i have a vine from which grow cats.

I’d like to see that. post link! I used to get my pussy willows and catkins mixed up, and thereby was laughed at by my fellow classmates. Children can be so cruel.

Response:

280805 wrote: > poet wrote: >> X-No-Archive: yes >> i have a vine from which grow cats. > I’d like to see that. post link! > I used to get my pussy willows and catkins mixed up, and thereby was > laughed at by my fellow classmates. Children can be so cruel.

You see I’m still doing it now. I meant lamb’s tails and catkins… oh the derision… I can hardly see for the tears of shame.

Response:

"280805" wrote in message

news:TyfQe.2154$h4.1082@newsfe4-win.ntli.net… – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> pegasus wrote: > > "sumire" wrote in message > > news:24820d1120d3fe6da12aab9db852cc82@localhost.talkaboutsupport.com… > >>Black bird excrement? Interesting. > >>So far I have had only white one. > >>I could take you have removed it > >>in the meantime. > >>Some side effect of bird excrement: > >>Lots of plants in my garden > >>from seeds contained in birdshit > >>have grown in the most impossible > >>places. E.g. a vine amidst my rose bushes. > >>Sumi > > Hi Sumi > > I was very surprised that it did wash out. As Thursday intimated, the > > colour of birdpoop is affected by diet. > > So this vine in your garden – does it grow decent grapes? Do you make your > > own wine? I tried once or twice with the grapes from the vine here, but it > > was way too dry for my taste. > Hang on. Are you saying you’ve got a vine? And Sumire’s got > a vine? Hey! I’ve got a vine too! That’s so weird all three > of us unconnected people having a vine. Does anyone else in > ASL have a vine? Is this an ASL thing or just a lonely woman > thing? I thought lonely women had cats.

In a recent survey, 100% of vine owners were lonely women. Does this warrant a new Government Health Warning? Perhaps there’s an underlying causal relationship [as opposed to a casual one. Sumi doesn't do casual ] I’ll tell you another thing we have in common, you and me, Ms Fair o’Face: recycling! I notice that the description for alt.support.loneliness on google groups is ‘It’s not easy being green’. I don’t have a cat by the way. I do look after other people’s occasionally. — For more information about this NNTP posting service, contact: h…@asarian-host.net — for all info about our server. If you want an anonymous account, visit our sign-up page: https://asarian-host.net/cgi-bin/signup.cgi

Response:

>>>Hi Sumi >>>I was very surprised that it did wash out. As Thursday intimated, the >>>colour of birdpoop is affected by diet. >>>So this vine in your garden – does it grow decent grapes? Do you make > your >>>own wine? I tried once or twice with the grapes from the vine here, but > it >>>was way too dry for my taste.

You know, as your wine is too dry and my wine is too sweet, perhaps a mix would work. My grapes are red an’ we make red wine. Although, this year I think we won’t bother. I’ve still got loads of elderflower lemonade to get rid of. I don’t know why but, instead of going lemonadey it went like a kind of elderflower syrup, it has a rather nasty stringy quality that won’t mix with other fluids like water. It’s a bit weird… the dynamics of it. Still. Musntgrumbl, it’s better than *not * having it I guess. – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text ->>Hang on. Are you saying you’ve got a vine? And Sumire’s got >>a vine? Hey! I’ve got a vine too! That’s so weird all three >>of us unconnected people having a vine. Does anyone else in >>ASL have a vine? Is this an ASL thing or just a lonely woman >>thing? I thought lonely women had cats. > In a recent survey, 100% of vine owners were lonely women. > Does this warrant a new Government Health Warning? > Perhaps there’s an underlying causal relationship [as opposed to a casual > one. Sumi doesn't do casual ] > I’ll tell you another thing we have in common, you and me, Ms Fair o’Face: > recycling! I notice that the description for alt.support.loneliness on > google groups is ‘It’s not easy being green’.

LOL! Ain’ that the truth? I’m still trying to understand why the local council has an aversion to plastic recycling. However all is not lost because when I contacted Tesco to complain [as is my wont] I received their assurance that all the plastic they use in all their packaging is biodegradeable, even the nets on the oranges and nectarines. And they always try to haul back all freight packaging in haulage so that that gets reused or recycled. So, if one is to believe what Tesco tells one, which I don’t but what choice do I have? They’re doing their bit for the environment. Speaking of which, do you know if the US has coped with Katrina? > I don’t have a cat by the way. I do look after other people’s occasionally.

Would you have one if you could?

Response:

I had not, until this day, correctly guessed your sex, madam. If any personal insult was addressed to your personage by this…assault of…unexpected effluvia, why, damn the fellow, or agency responsible, I vow, ’twill be pistols at dawn! OTS "pegasus" wrote in message

news:1191bacd.2f003ebc1ef575416ca4b8462@asarian-host.net… – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> When I was walking into town this morning, as I passed under a tree a huge > load of black excrement landed on my head, some splashing down onto my white > skirt and blouse. "Oh yuk!!! What *was* that?" I exclaimed, looking up > into the leafy branches to try and spot the culprit. A couple coming the > other way stopped to commiserate. "I think it was a bird", the woman > offered helpfully. Hmm… despite the volume and colour, I hadn’t really > thought it might be an elephant up there, surprisingly. "There’s some on > your …" she gestured at my right boob, where I now had a big black nipple. > I grinned. "Think I’d better go home and change." They smiled back > apologetically, clearly wanting to help but recognising there was little > they could do. On the way home again I met one of my neighbours going the > other way. We swapped greetings in passing, and I watched with amusement as > her eyes were drawn magnetically to my chest but old-fashioned courtesy kept > her from comment > — > For more information about this NNTP posting service, contact: > h…@asarian-host.net — for all info about our server. > If you want an anonymous account, visit our sign-up page: > https://asarian-host.net/cgi-bin/signup.cgi

Response:

Madam, I vow that insult will also be… How many ladies have been so afflicted in this thread? It may take some considerable time to right the wrongs that have been done, to restore honour & c. OTS "poet" wrote in message

news:08fead1d34204fe.7a4a4e4e4fd25607b9@asarian-host.net… – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> X-No-Archive: yes > In article 1191bacd.2f003ebc1ef575416ca4b8…@asarian-host.net, pegasus at > pega…@asarian-host.net wrote on 8/25/05 8:10: > > When I was walking into town this morning, as I passed under a tree a huge > > load of black excrement landed on my head, some splashing down onto my > > white skirt and blouse. "Oh yuk!!! What *was* that?" I exclaimed, looking > > up into the leafy branches to try and spot the culprit. > when i was twelveish, i was enjoying a fine summer evening in the yard with > the parents and a neighbour. suddenly, i felt a splat on my head. i reached > up, and my hand came away from my hair covered in white goop. no one > noticed, and they all look surprised when i got up and announced, ‘hmmm, > well, i think it’s time for a shower.’ i’d never shown that much interest in > cleanliness during daylight hours before. > — > For more information about this posting service, contact: > h…@asarian-host.net — for all info about our server. > If you want an anonymous account, visit our sign-up page: > https://asarian-host.net/cgi-bin/signup.cgi

Response:

Anyone: Discuss loneliness

admin — Mon, 22 Aug 2005 00:00:00 +0000

Question:

Anyone: Discuss loneliness. Give advice to the lonely who ask for it. Ask for advice if you want it. If you just want to express your own lonely, needy feelings without input, go to "Anyone: If You Felt Lonely Today. . .II" This thread is for self-expression without input. Thank you.

Response:

Anon-e-Mouse wrote: > Anyone: Discuss loneliness. Give advice to the lonely who ask for it. > Ask for advice if you want it. > If you just want to express your own lonely, needy feelings without > input, go to "Anyone: If You Felt Lonely Today. . .II" *That* thread > is for self-expression without input. > Thank you.

[Oh I see... we're creating a schism. I *do* like schisms they really help with tidying up and sorting stuff out I find.] I don’t think I have the capacity to tell others how they feel or how they should be feeling, perhaps when I’m 230840 I’ll be wise enough we’ll have to wait and see. But for now… Just to help the paradigms for some, dictionary.com gives the following definition: 3 entries found for loneliness. lone

A bit happy and unhappy

admin — Tue, 02 Aug 2005 00:00:00 +0000

Question:

I feel kind of happy today and kind of unhappy too. Go figger. Damo

Response:

"DAMO XXII Ruler of Universe" wrote in message news:23312-42EFB19D-1648@storefull-3233.bay.webtv.net… >I feel kind of happy today and kind of unhappy too. > Go figger. > Damo

Sometimes the sky is quiet and lonely. Sometimes the sky is full of sunshine. I feel the same as you Damo, a kind of empathy here. A kind of happy unhappiness. A sadness that might resolve, with some distant memories, things we can’t change, only remember. Childhood lost. An unknown future. Love today, in the quiet of a sky, some kind of loneliness, friendship, companionship. Like the understanding of one good friend. A hand to hold in the night. In the rain. In the dark. In forever. Without question.