Group Hug….
Question:
>A special {{{{{{{{{{ hug}}}}}}}}} to Gina and Chief, who were missed >here… >and returned… >Frans
Ahhh….thank you, Frans, for the very sweet welcome back hug. I’ve been missing those, ya know. Hugs and Smiles.. Gina "I tell you something just ain’t right… My head is on loose but my shoes are tight…" — Offspring
Response:
spoo…@banet.net wrote: > The hugs here are for support and not the touchy feely hugs you are looking for > Robert. No offense is intended, just the feeling of knowing friends are here > willing you help and that you are in there thoughts & vice versa. I often > visualize the hugs and they are gentle yet firm to support me not molest.
I agree, darlin’. We offer our supportive hugs to those we are caring of, be they men or women, and they are not meant as being romantic or sexual. Most people here understand that. Thank you for making it clearer to those who have need of explanation. Hugs, Jae "If you say, "I can’t", you won’t…. If you say, "I quit", you lose…… If you say, "I’ll try", you just might win….. Only *you* have the power to choose……"
Response:
On 12 Apr 1999 09:51:30 GMT, r…@shell.netmagic.net (Robert Maas) wrote: >You were OK up to here, but: ><<I am quite happy to believe that those that offer hugs here would be >happy to offer them under the same circumstances in RL. I cannot >imagine that the wonderful people here would be any less willing to be >supportive or helpful in RL than they are here.>> >You’re completely wrong on that point. I found out the hard way that >when Janet (JackieChan…@WebTV.net) started sending me sweet notes and >virtual hugs to me Feb.12, in response to my serious and caring >attempts to help her, she had no intention whatsoever of meeting me in >person (she lives in San Jose, about 25 minutes from here by freeway) >and sharing real-life hugs.
I’d argue that I’m not completely wrong at all. Only wrong in regards to that particular instance. There could be hundreds of reasons why Janet did not want to hug you in real life. Perhaps she was concerned that she did not know you well enough? Perhaps she was scared to meet you in person because she felt she hadn’t been totally honest about her appearance or something similar? As I said, hundreds of reasons… you’d be the one to have the best idea as to why she didn’t. Would you not agree that it is a little unfair to tar everyone that "hugs" with the same brush? As I said, I view "hugs" as a token of support when people use them here. An abstract concept to demonstrate caring and support of a person. Perhaps you do not, cannot or will not see them in the same way? The one thing I’ve noticed is that you’ve only taken the women to task about "hugging"… Maddog and Chief also "hug" (among others) but I’ve not noticed you complaining to them? Maybe you don’t read their posts or perhaps you don’t feel comfortable being hugged by a guy? That of course leads to the next question of how a supportive hug from a woman is any different to a supportive hug from a guy… they aren’t meant to be sexual… but anyway, I’m leading in a particular direction without hearing first what you have to say. I am only asking these questions and trying to explore your point of view mostly because the impression I gathered was that you were accusing certain people here of "teasing" you when I really don’t think they had that intention at all and may themselves have been a little hurt by your comments. – credo —–BEGIN GEEK CODE BLOCK—– Version: 3.1 GO d–(++) s++: a– C+++ US P L W++ N++ o? K- w O- M V? PS+@ PE@ Y+ PGP- t++*@ 5+ X R+ !tv b+++ DI++ D++ G e h r– I* y++ ——END GEEK CODE BLOCK——
Response:
A special {{{{{{{{{{ hug}}}}}}}}} to Gina and Chief, who were missed here… and returned… Frans
Response:
- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text ->I don’t wish to offend Robert but I doubt very much that anyone here >is purposely trying to "tease" you. Gina, Jae, Chief and others here >all often attach a "hug" to the end of their message… not to remind >you of the fact that you haven’t been getting any RL affection but as >a sign of support. >A hug between friends is a supportive gesture… a sharing of strength >and warmth. Yes, I appreciate that the word "hug" written on a screen >is by no means anything like getting a real one but it is a symbol of >support. When you read of a friend in trouble and you fail to find the >words to support them, yet you wish to show that you are there for >them I can’t think of anything else more appropriate than a "hug". >If you have an alternative, I’d very much like to hear it. It may be a >better way of showing support. >As far as how genuine those tokens are, I am quite happy to believe >that those that offer hugs here would be happy to offer them under the >same circumstances in RL. I cannot imagine that the wonderful people >here would be any less willing to be supportive or helpful in RL than >they are here. >Perhaps the clue is to see these hugs as a token of support rather >than affection? Please feel free to correct me at any time if I’m >going down the wrong path. >I can also appreciate your point of view if you’ve been hurt by false >signs of affection over the ‘net. I know I’ve been caught out and hurt >real bad by a false display of affection over the ‘net. However, what >I keep in mind is that often the people here are have been thru the >same or even worse things than I have… they have no desire to be >lying about their feelings or being lied to themselves. I certainly >don’t see ASL as a beat for singles (ie: a place to go to find a >partner)… and I’m not suggesting that you see things like that >either… only that in keeping in mind that this is a support group, >not a dating service the hugs I get here I view as strictly >supportive, not of pure affection. >Anyway, I’m asking you to consider this alternative… to see things >the way I see them. Perhaps if you like, you could expand on how you >see things so I can get a better understanding of your viewpoint? >You’re welcome to post or e-mail… whichever is your preference. >- credo
Dear Credo…. To borrow a response usually given by Papa, if I may….. "Bravo!!!" … and thank you. I can’t really comment further, since I’m so far behind in reading the messages, I’m not real sure what’s going on…..but I do like your explanation of the concept of the hugs and the purpose of ASL. Hugs and Smiles, Gina "I tell you something just ain’t right… My head is on loose but my shoes are tight…" — Offspring
Response:
Well….Since Chief needed those hugs….and Kurki needs hugs….and I’m sure others of us could use a hug or two (or butt load?)…..I’m sending a group hug……. {{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{HUGS}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}} }}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}
and Smiles, Gina "I tell you something just ain’t right… My head is on loose but my shoes are tight…" — Offspring
Response:
Oh I love a good "Group Grope." Back atcha. Hugs — Eddie (Chief) Loneliness Perceived Is Loneliness Conceived – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -Gina R12 <gina…@aol.com> wrote in message news:19990406220345.05308.00001965@ngol02.aol.com… > Well….Since Chief needed those hugs….and Kurki needs hugs….and I’m sure > others of us could use a hug or two (or butt load?)…..I’m sending a group > hug……. > {{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{HUGS}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}} > }}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}} > and Smiles, > Gina > "I tell you something just ain’t right… > My head is on loose but my shoes are tight…" > — Offspring
Response:
Tue, 06 Apr 1999 19:03:45 alt.support.loneliness Thread 82 of 182 Lines 12 Group Hug…. 1 Response gina…@aol.com Gina R12 at AOL http://www.aol.com <<Well….Since Chief needed those hugs….and Kurki needs hugs….and I’m sure others of us could use a hug or two (or butt load?)…..I’m sending a group hug…….{{{{{{{{{{{{{HUGS}}}}}}}}}}>> I would like a group hug, but only in real life. It’s just a hurtful tease to get a virtual affection-symbol like above which makes me imagine the real thing and remind me how starved I am for it. By the way, I got two more individual hugs Friday evening, from Trudy and Laurie, and two more hugs Saturday, one from sweet pretty Erin, and one from the member of the debate/speech team (at SCU for the big meet) who looked sort of like the late Mariel Hemmingway, who said she gave over 20 hugs already that one day so I got one more. So my total number of hugs in 3.5 years (all since mid-February this year, zero for previous 3.3 years) is 12 (1 from Connie, 2 from MarieBeth, 3 from Samn, 3 from Trudy, 1 from Laurie, 1 from Erin, 1 from pseudo-Mariel). Tue, 06 Apr 1999 22:08:25 alt.support.loneliness Thread 82 of 182 Lines 27 Re: Group Hug…. Respno 1 of 1 e…@cwix.com Chief <<Oh I love a good "Group Grope.">> What a great idea, but again, in RL only. I would love to get together with a bunch of women to spend an hour groping each other, if I am correct in guessing what that means. (Ok, to be fair, a gender-balanced group, sigh, 3 guys including me, and 3 gals including the actress who plays "Lisa" on "News Radio".)
Response:
Sorry… these thoughts are a little scattered… hope its still in a vaguely logical order. On 11 Apr 1999 10:17:48 GMT, r…@shell.netmagic.net (Robert Maas) wrote: >I would like a group hug, but only in real life. It’s just a hurtful >tease to get a virtual affection-symbol like above which makes me >imagine the real thing and remind me how starved I am for it.
I don’t wish to offend Robert but I doubt very much that anyone here is purposely trying to "tease" you. Gina, Jae, Chief and others here all often attach a "hug" to the end of their message… not to remind you of the fact that you haven’t been getting any RL affection but as a sign of support. A hug between friends is a supportive gesture… a sharing of strength and warmth. Yes, I appreciate that the word "hug" written on a screen is by no means anything like getting a real one but it is a symbol of support. When you read of a friend in trouble and you fail to find the words to support them, yet you wish to show that you are there for them I can’t think of anything else more appropriate than a "hug". If you have an alternative, I’d very much like to hear it. It may be a better way of showing support. As far as how genuine those tokens are, I am quite happy to believe that those that offer hugs here would be happy to offer them under the same circumstances in RL. I cannot imagine that the wonderful people here would be any less willing to be supportive or helpful in RL than they are here. Perhaps the clue is to see these hugs as a token of support rather than affection? Please feel free to correct me at any time if I’m going down the wrong path. I can also appreciate your point of view if you’ve been hurt by false signs of affection over the ‘net. I know I’ve been caught out and hurt real bad by a false display of affection over the ‘net. However, what I keep in mind is that often the people here are have been thru the same or even worse things than I have… they have no desire to be lying about their feelings or being lied to themselves. I certainly don’t see ASL as a beat for singles (ie: a place to go to find a partner)… and I’m not suggesting that you see things like that either… only that in keeping in mind that this is a support group, not a dating service the hugs I get here I view as strictly supportive, not of pure affection. Anyway, I’m asking you to consider this alternative… to see things the way I see them. Perhaps if you like, you could expand on how you see things so I can get a better understanding of your viewpoint? You’re welcome to post or e-mail… whichever is your preference. – credo —–BEGIN GEEK CODE BLOCK—– Version: 3.1 GO d–(++) s++: a– C+++ US P L W++ N++ o? K- w O- M V? PS+@ PE@ Y+ PGP- t++*@ 5+ X R+ !tv b+++ DI++ D++ G e h r– I* y++ ——END GEEK CODE BLOCK——
Response:
The hugs here are for support and not the touchy feely hugs you are looking for Robert. No offense is intended, just the feeling of knowing friends are here willing you help and that you are in there thoughts & vice versa. I often visualize the hugs and they are gentle yet firm to support me not molest. Hugs Eddie (Chief) – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -Gina R12 wrote: > >I don’t wish to offend Robert but I doubt very much that anyone here > >is purposely trying to "tease" you. Gina, Jae, Chief and others here > >all often attach a "hug" to the end of their message… not to remind > >you of the fact that you haven’t been getting any RL affection but as > >a sign of support. > >A hug between friends is a supportive gesture… a sharing of strength > >and warmth. Yes, I appreciate that the word "hug" written on a screen > >is by no means anything like getting a real one but it is a symbol of > >support. When you read of a friend in trouble and you fail to find the > >words to support them, yet you wish to show that you are there for > >them I can’t think of anything else more appropriate than a "hug". > >If you have an alternative, I’d very much like to hear it. It may be a > >better way of showing support. > >As far as how genuine those tokens are, I am quite happy to believe > >that those that offer hugs here would be happy to offer them under the > >same circumstances in RL. I cannot imagine that the wonderful people > >here would be any less willing to be supportive or helpful in RL than > >they are here. > >Perhaps the clue is to see these hugs as a token of support rather > >than affection? Please feel free to correct me at any time if I’m > >going down the wrong path. > >I can also appreciate your point of view if you’ve been hurt by false > >signs of affection over the ‘net. I know I’ve been caught out and hurt > >real bad by a false display of affection over the ‘net. However, what > >I keep in mind is that often the people here are have been thru the > >same or even worse things than I have… they have no desire to be > >lying about their feelings or being lied to themselves. I certainly > >don’t see ASL as a beat for singles (ie: a place to go to find a > >partner)… and I’m not suggesting that you see things like that > >either… only that in keeping in mind that this is a support group, > >not a dating service the hugs I get here I view as strictly > >supportive, not of pure affection. > >Anyway, I’m asking you to consider this alternative… to see things > >the way I see them. Perhaps if you like, you could expand on how you > >see things so I can get a better understanding of your viewpoint? > >You’re welcome to post or e-mail… whichever is your preference. > >- credo > Dear Credo…. > To borrow a response usually given by Papa, if I may….. "Bravo!!!" … and > thank you. I can’t really comment further, since I’m so far behind in reading > the messages, I’m not real sure what’s going on…..but I do like your > explanation of the concept of the hugs and the purpose of ASL. > Hugs and Smiles, > Gina > "I tell you something just ain’t right… > My head is on loose but my shoes are tight…" > — Offspring
Response:
Sun, 11 Apr 1999 08:22:24 alt.support.loneliness Thread 82 of 204 Lines 64 Re: Group Hug…. Respno 3 of 4 turi…@astro.com.au credo at iiNet Technologies You were OK up to here, but: <<I am quite happy to believe that those that offer hugs here would be happy to offer them under the same circumstances in RL. I cannot imagine that the wonderful people here would be any less willing to be supportive or helpful in RL than they are here.>> You’re completely wrong on that point. I found out the hard way that when Janet (JackieChan…@WebTV.net) started sending me sweet notes and virtual hugs to me Feb.12, in response to my serious and caring attempts to help her, she had no intention whatsoever of meeting me in person (she lives in San Jose, about 25 minutes from here by freeway) and sharing real-life hugs. <I can also appreciate your point of view if you’ve been hurt by false signs of affection over the ‘net.>> Yes.
Response:
On 07 Apr 1999 02:03:45 GMT, gina…@aol.com (Gina R12) wrote: >Well….Since Chief needed those hugs….and Kurki needs hugs….and I’m sure >others of us could use a hug or two (or butt load?)…..I’m sending a group >hug……. >{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{HUGS}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}} >}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}} >and Smiles, >Gina
Hmmm… why this post has only just showed up on my server I’ll never know. Would have preferred to get this hug on that day in question rather than now… still, late is better than never! Anyway, thanks so much for the group hug Gina… much appreciated <smile>. – credo —–BEGIN GEEK CODE BLOCK—– Version: 3.1 GO d–(++) s++: a– C+++ US P L W++ N++ o? K- w O- M V? PS+@ PE@ Y+ PGP- t++*@ 5+ X R+ !tv b+++ DI++ D++ G e h r– I* y++ ——END GEEK CODE BLOCK——
Response:
Filed under: Loneliness
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