Lonely Loneliness

Does anyone else feel this way?

Question:

I’ve been told by so many people that there is nothing wrong with me and yet I have no friends. I have gone out and extended myself and have tried joining various clubs and volunteering at many places and have even tried going back to school. I went out to concerts on my own even though I felt uncomfortable. Everyone tells me I am doing exactly what I should be doing but nothing seems to work. I can barely keep my head above water at work and even though I worked hard and didn’t goof off or anything, I still feel overwhelmed.Noone has any suggestions how to improve. I try and be upbeat and always supportive of people but they always dump me when they find someone cooler and don’t even take the time just to say hi. Of course noone will tell me what is wrong with me. I’ve seen differant therapists and none of them have any answers. I no longer have any energy. I’m surprised I was able to write this. I am sick of trying. I know I shouldn’t give up but I am sick of it all and see little point to anything. I fear that the problem is me and there is nothing that can be done. This is a lousy attitude, I know, but having a positive outlook certainly didn’t help. It’s about time I admitted I suck and there’s nothing that can be done. I was only deluding myself by thinking otherwise. I wonder if anyone else has felt this way. Just checking. Mike

Response:

CATNIP3700 wrote: > I’ve been told by so many people that there is nothing wrong with me and yet I > have no friends.

    <snipped> > I wonder if anyone else has felt this way. > Just checking.

    Darlin’….I’m glad you came here again.  You know how truly that I wish I had answers for you.  Each time you post here about this, I wish and hope and pray that someone will have answers for you.  It is difficult, as I’ve told you, because we are not with you in real life.  We do not see your body language or facial expressions when you speak.  We only know your heart here, darlin’……and your caring, supportive nature.  We cannot "see" if there is something about you that might turn people away.     I know you have tried many things and that nothing seems to work for you.  You have not simply sat and waited and hoped.  I cannot tell you why what you have tried does not work.  I’m sorry.  comforting hugs, Jae —             "When we cling to pain……                    we end up punishing ourselves."                            Leo F. Burscaglia

Response:

Hello, Mike, I am glad to see you here with us again… but I am sad, that it is a heavy heart of loneliness, that bring you to us… And sad, that once again I have no answers for you, to help you overcome that loneliness, and that pain you hold in your heart… Mike, I do understand the things you said, and you know, that I too know that feeling of frustration, and hopelessness, and that weariness of spirit, that robs the soul of life… and I too have wondered if there was any point in going on… but time and again, I have had to answer that same question, "Is it worth it to go on?"… .. with a yes… As I said, I have no answers… but I wanted you to know that you had been heard, and that I do feel compassion for this pain you carry… and that I do understand what this does to your heart, spirit, and soul… I am sorry, my brother… I do pray that you continue to search for those answers for which you seek, and that you may find that hope, once again… and that you can draw strength from that hope… for sometimes, hope is all we have… Mike, I wish you peace, brother… and I wish you hope…                            warm, comforting hugs,                            Michael  "…We are made to persist.      That is how we find out who we are…"                              Tobias Wolff In article <19990425010344.00941.00001…@ng143.aol.com>, catnip3…@aol.com – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -(CATNIP3700) wrote: >I’ve been told by so many people that there is nothing wrong with me and yet I >have no friends. >I have gone out and extended myself and have tried joining various clubs and >volunteering at many places and have even tried going back to school. I went >out to concerts on my own even though I felt uncomfortable. Everyone tells me I >am doing exactly what I should be doing but nothing seems to work. >I can barely keep my head above water at work and even though I worked hard and >didn’t goof off or anything, I still feel overwhelmed.Noone has any suggestions >how to improve. >I try and be upbeat and always supportive of people but they always dump me >when they find someone cooler and don’t even take the time just to say hi. Of >course noone will tell me what is wrong with me. >I’ve seen differant therapists and none of them have any answers. >I no longer have any energy. I’m surprised I was able to write this. I am sick >of trying. I know I shouldn’t give up but I am sick of it all and see little >point to anything. >I fear that the problem is me and there is nothing that can be done. This is a >lousy attitude, I know, but having a positive outlook certainly didn’t help. >It’s about time I admitted I suck and there’s nothing that can be done. I was >only deluding myself by thinking otherwise. >I wonder if anyone else has felt this way. >Just checking. >Mike

Response:

Dear Mike…. {{{{{{{{{{{{{{{hugs}}}}}}}}}}}}}}} You’ve been a very good friend to me and helped me many times.  I know it isn’t the same as real life…but you are a pretty special friend to me.  I wish I had some magical words for you, Mike, but I don’t.  I can only tell you that I see absolutely nothing wrong with you.  I’m so very sorry that you are feeling so bummed out right now and I’m hoping you’ll regain your strength that I’ve seen so many times.  Rest….but never quit.  If you want to talk, you know my address.  Sending you feel better Hugs and Smiles, Gina "Sometimes when the cuckoo’s crying … When the moon is half way down… Sometimes when the night is dying … I take me out and I wander around…"                  — Grateful Dead

Response:

I do! ———–== Posted via Deja News, The Discussion Network ==———- http://www.dejanews.com/       Search, Read, Discuss, or Start Your Own    

Response:

Mike, are we twins? Sheesh, I’ve never known a person to express what I feel so well. I am in almost exactly the same situation. I’ve been a loner most of my life, sure I’ve had a few friends even fewer good friends but I seem to attract people who need someone to boost their selfconfidence for a while and then shut them out of their lives. The only way I can deal with it (IF I can, I have my moments) is by living my life the way I see fit, continuing to help people if I can, finding beauty and satisfaction in things, feeling comfortable with my own company and finally by trying to face up to challenges and fears so that I can make some attempt to build my own self-confidence. Is there anything at all that you’ve been wanting to do for years but have put off because you were too scared? Well, now’s the time to do it! I recently completed a beginners dive course, something that I’ve been wanting to do for YEARS but have put off because of my irrational fear of whatever might be down there. It’s an amazing feeling, I still feel nervous obviously, apparently that’s normal and most divers experience it, but I still jump in anyway and love every minute of it. Umm… I think that’s it, if you want to email me for a chat or whatever just replace the nospam part of my email addy with willow Take care On 25 Apr 1999 05:03:44 GMT, catnip3…@aol.com (CATNIP3700) wrote: – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text ->I’ve been told by so many people that there is nothing wrong with me and yet I >have no friends. >I have gone out and extended myself and have tried joining various clubs and >volunteering at many places and have even tried going back to school. I went >out to concerts on my own even though I felt uncomfortable. Everyone tells me I >am doing exactly what I should be doing but nothing seems to work. >I can barely keep my head above water at work and even though I worked hard and >didn’t goof off or anything, I still feel overwhelmed.Noone has any suggestions >how to improve. >I try and be upbeat and always supportive of people but they always dump me >when they find someone cooler and don’t even take the time just to say hi. Of >course noone will tell me what is wrong with me. >I’ve seen differant therapists and none of them have any answers. >I no longer have any energy. I’m surprised I was able to write this. I am sick >of trying. I know I shouldn’t give up but I am sick of it all and see little >point to anything. >I fear that the problem is me and there is nothing that can be done. This is a >lousy attitude, I know, but having a positive outlook certainly didn’t help. >It’s about time I admitted I suck and there’s nothing that can be done. I was >only deluding myself by thinking otherwise. >I wonder if anyone else has felt this way. >Just checking. >Mike

The missing and not to be taken seriously under ANY circumstances garden gnome http://www.starwon.com.au/~willow ~~Faeries are able to fly because they take themselves lightly~

Response:

Filed under: Overcome loneliness

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